Pieces of Forever

61 - MELISSA

The way that he is looking at her doesn't really help with my emotions. I keep my eyes on her as he wets a cloth and pats her forehead down a little. I am so fucking jealous right now. He probably won't be this nice to me, because we don't know whose child I'm carrying. Cameron will definitely be doing all this for me. Well, he would have. I really don't know what he would do now.

I snap out of my thoughts as the doctor walks into the room, and Jason introduces himself to her as the baby's father. Yet, he won't claim mine for even a second. Maybe I'm asking too much. I really don't know, but I don't think that I am. He said he wanted me back and he wanted our marriage, regardless of the child that I'm carrying. I don't even know why I'm hurting my brain thinking about all this. Just seeing Leslie here about to give birth to his child, is enough to make me realize that this may not be his girl. Leslie will always be a part of our life.

"I think that she might be ready to push."

I turn to the doctor, watching as she goes under the sheets. Leslie winces a little as the doctor checks her cervix.

"Show time." She smiles as she pulls the sheet up all the way up her leg, exposing her a little.

I turn away, listening as the doctor explain to Leslie how to push little Jason out. She gives instructions to Jason to hold Leslie's leg back a little.

Well, it seem to be going down, rather or not I'm ready.

I stand up, feeling a bit dizzy and lightheaded. "I'm about to get some water." I stand up and walk towards the door.

Jason looks confused as he looks at me.

I walk out the door and stand against the door, listening to the sounds of Leslie grunts and screams as she pushes Jason's baby out.

I walk completely away from the door. I love Jason more than I will love anything in this world, but this whole thing is a little too much to take for me. I'm not that strong to be able to deal with this. I don't know why he thought that I was. I told him that I would accept the situation for what it was, but I don't remember telling him that I will be here for the birth of his son.

*****

I sit on a bench outside the hospital, holding my phone to my ear. I tap my feet impatiently on the pavement, because I'm so nervous.

"What it do, ma?"

I smile at the sound of his voice. I haven't heard from Cameron, since the last time that we talked.

"How's the baby?"

He sounds like he really cares.

"Good. Um . . . When I went to my ultrasound appointment, they told me that I was having a girl."

"A girl?" He says with excitement in his voice. "For real? You got those ultrasound pictures? What are we going to name her?"

"I don't know. I haven't been thinking about names."

"Paris Angel?"

I laugh the name he suggested.

"Camille?"

This name makes me laugh even harder, thinking about the days where he used to be my Camille. "Camille. Did you ever think that you and I would actually be using this name?"

He laughs a little. "Naw . . . I can't say that I have. Maybe you can mail me one of the ultrasound pictures, or two."

I giggle a little. This is refreshing, because this is more than I had gotten from Jason. Instead, he likes to call it my baby.

"I might. I don't have to mail it, because we're in Chicago."

"Yeah? For what?"

I get a little quiet, wondering how much I should tell him. Fuck it. He knows everything about me. "She's having his baby right now. We flew out this morning."