Dear Diary || Kim Jongdae

|Page 19|

12/19/15

Dear diary,

Kyungsoo wanted to move some of his stuff on his own today, even when the major move isn't until the following week after Christmas. He asked me and Jongin to help him. It would've been a bigger help if I brought my swole-af oppa, but again he was gone for his internship. So, the three amigos reunited.

We had a rental pick-up truck thanks to Papa Do, so to help us with the move. Most of today was us moving squishy's stuff from his house to his new one, which was four hours away. Usually, I would've turned down the idea of being stuck in a truck for four hours, but I did it for the sake of Kyungsoo.

But for some reason, for some damn reason, most of that drive consisted of him nagging me off about Jongdae. Apparently, he and Jongin were talking about what happened two days ago at the movies. Kyungsoo went off to rant about how oddly salty Jongdae had been between my and Jongin's closeness. And blah blah "what did I tell you" and "what am I going to do with you when I'm away."

You think I wanted to be berated about how to control my feelings? I mean, it didn't fuckin help that it was that time of month but god damn it! I know I shouldn't have a crush on him but at least let me stay friends with him, right? The whole damn ride to the new house and this is what I get for wanting to hang out with my two best friends? Like I fucking know, okay? I get it that Jongdae has a girlfriend. I get it that he's isn't the most modest or the most innocent. He's someone that could possibly get me in trouble one day. I GET IT.

I did something I didn't think I would do. Right in the middle of bringing Kyungsoo's stuff into the new house, I managed to call a cab and leave before they could notice. Honestly, this was one of the more risky things I've done in my life. But I was so done with those two. 

... They're still trying to call and text me, asking me where I went. I feel a little guilty, but I can't deal with them... Sorry boys, I need to cool down first.

I wonder if Sulli's home... I'm going to see if she can hang out right now, it's been a while anyway. Besides, it'd be good to get a girl's perspective about my situation.