You & I (Niam Horayne)

The Pain

Here's your second update! Please don't hate me!

Chapter 30:

NIALL

Nothing felt right anymore. I felt numb. I felt used. I felt so stupid for falling in love when I already knew that love didn't last. My parents proved that for me, but I was stupid enough to forget that. And all because of Liam. It even hurt to think of him now.

I didn't want to go inside my home. I was just outside by the front door. Stepping inside of my home was like stepping inside a house full of lies. It's where we've always lived, and that 'perfect' family with the husband and wife that were so 'in love' doesn't exist anymore. It's nothing but a sham.

Still, it was getting dark out, and I couldn't stay outside forever. I pushed the door open and stepped inside of my home, hearing silence. I turned to the coat rack and hung up my coat, freezing when I saw the family photo that hung on the wall.

It was all four of us, smiling and looking so happy. I hated the thought of it. We wouldn't all be happy if we knew what was to come. My mum wouldn't be happy if she knew my dad was a cheater. My dad wouldn't be happy if he knew he was a disappointment to his own son. I wouldn't be happy if I knew that love was shitty, and that one person can make you forget that only to hate it ten times more.

"Niall? Is that you?" My mum asked as she came out of the kitchen. "Where were you all day? You had me worried sick! You missed dinner. Your school called and said you skipped out on your classes. Niall, I did not raise you this way. You've always been such a good kid. If your father found out-"

"But he's not gonna is he? Because you can't talk to him without trying to get back together with him. That seems to be all that's ever on your mind anymore. Get over him! He's a dick who left us for another woman. Your love isn't love, Okay!?" I yelled, and my mum looked taken back.

"Niall, where is all of this coming from? Have you been crying?" She asked.

"Oh now you notice something wrong with me? Remember when you told me not to take someone for granted because they might disappear? Wait, no, you were too drunk to remember! But I took your advice. Being my stupid self, I took your advice and I only got my heart ripped to pieces! He didn't disappear! He never will! He'll be a constant memory of how stupid I am to ever fall in love!" I yelled.

"He? Niall are you-"

"Yes, mum! I'm gay, okay!? It only took you so long to notice!" I was furious and even more broken now. This wasn't the way I planned to come out to my parents, well my mum, but no doubt my dad will find out soon. I didn't want her to react badly. I couldn't handle that right now.

"Niall... is the boy Lia-" She was going to ask, but I didn't want to hear his name. It would hurt too much. I think she saw this, too, as I choked back a sob from just hearing her almost say it.

"Yes. It was. But I'm done. I'm done with relationships. I'm done with love. It's stupid and it fucking hurts. Not like he gave a shit about me anyways." I muttered before I walked away from her and to my room. I heard her call my name, but I just slammed my door and locked it behind me.

I threw my backpack on the floor, not caring about the tons of homework I had to do. I wasn't in the mood for anything right now. I climbed into bed and curled up in the covers, letting the heavy sobs finally escape. I shook as I cried, just wishing that this numbing feeling in my heart would go away. I didn't need him, but I knew that was a lie. Even if I didn't want to, I still loved him. But, God, love was fucked up.
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LIAM

I walked into my house and past the living room, not stopped when my mum asked me what was wrong. I just ran past her and up the stairs. I hated life right now. I hated myself for being so stupid. I hated Nathan for liking me. I hated Niall for not letting me explain, but I also loved him. I loved him so much it hurt to think about how hurt he looked.

I went to my room and laid down on the bed, just staring at the ceiling as the tears fell down my cheeks. I hated myself. Why was I stupid enough to kiss Nathan? Why did he have to turn his head? Why did this have to happen?

There was a knock on my door, but I wasn't in the mood. "Can you go away, mum!" I tried to yell, but my voice was weak and hoarse from crying roughly. The door opened, and I looked over, seeing Louis standing there.

"Hey, Liam. What happened?" He asked. He walked over to me and held me in a hug, which only made me cry harder due to the comfort. I didn't deserve the comfort. I'm the one who messed everything up.

"Ni-Niall though I k-k-kissed Nathan." I stuttered out. "It was a misunderstanding! I swear! He told me he liked me. He told Matt he was gay and got beat up for it. I told him that I loved Niall though, and he asked for one kiss- just on the cheek, but he turned his head at the last minute and Niall saw. He thought I kissed him, but I would never do that! I love him, Louis! I love him so much!"

I began to cry heavily into Louis's chest, but he didn't mind. He hugged me tight as he said "It'll be okay, Liam. You'll be okay. We can fix this. We'll make Niall understand that you didn't mean to."

"No! We can't fix this! He looked so hurt when he saw! Louis, he said he loved me, too. He was afraid to love, but he loved me. And I broke him. He's not gonna forgive me. And I love him so much!" I cried.

"Shh. It's fine, Liam. Everything will be okay. You'll get through this. And I'll be by your side. Just let it all out." He said, and I did. I cried with Louis holding me the whole time- for hours. I became weak and sleepy, feeling myself drifting off as Louis held me, but I only wanted Niall's arms wrapped around me. I loved him so much.