DAY 9:

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Words For Mikey: Day 9

Penetralia: the most private or secret things

It seems that we are all plagued with penetralia lately, Mikey. All we ever seem to do is keep secrets from each other. Like them ambushing me to take me home and all the conversations that they had without me. But then I'm keeping a secret to, I'm not telling them how much I want to leave. I want to be wherever you are, so if you die, then, Mikey, I'll be right behind you. So that's my penetralia, I can't wait to find out the others. Time has a funny way of doing that you know? Of revealing the truth no matter how terrible or horrific and no matter the circumstances. But I guess that brutal honesty is better than sweet lies. It probably doesn't seem that way but I think I would rather the truth. Imagine the complete and utter betrayal when you realize that it's all just some lie or big old joke. Never mind actually, it's nearly as painful as this. Was this your penetralia? I'm sorry I wasn't at the hospital with you today. Ashton and Calum wouldn't take me and they wouldn't let me leave the house either.

I love you,

Luke

Michael could tell he was alone. It felt as if there was a gaping hole in his chest. He felt the lack of another presence and the voice in his head encouraging him softly seemed to fade and grow weaker. When it died out completely Michael grew completely terrified.

That was when the nightmares started.

Originally it was his mum and dad beating him and torturing him. It stretched on continuously until Michael would look up and see Calum or Ashton or Liz beating him into submission. And then it went the next step and it was Luke.

Rationally, Michael knew known of this was real, he knew none of it could actually happen. He knew Luke would rather die than ever hurt Michael. But it seemed so real. They repeated themselves over and over until Michael was convinced these things actually happened. He seemed to forget that Luke, Ashton, Calum and Liz would never actually hurt him. And somehow it managed to get even worse.

Michael was on his way up the stairs of Luke's house to his and Luke's room when he froze, he was certain he had heard something odd coming from the room. When it was silent for a while Michael kept going until he heard another creak accompanied by laboured breathing. His eyebrows furrowed and he began worrying about what he would find.

Was Luke having a seizure? Was he being attacked? Was there someone else in the house?

Michael thought up incredibly farfetched scenarios about elves and giants, but when he did open the door he was met with the one sight he had never thought possible.

Luke was hovering above some small girl in their bed their lips locked in a passionate kiss. When Michael gasped both of their heads snapped towards him, but the girl only smiled coyly before beginning to kiss along Luke's collar bone. He watched Michael for some time as the boy in black fell to his knees in the doorway before turning back to the girl. Michael tried closing his eyes, but it was as if his eyelids were a screen for some unseen projector and he was forced to watch as Luke and the girl kissed and had sex and with every thrust and moan Michael broke just a little more because that was his Luke, only he was with someone else.

And it still managed to get worse for Michael.

The scene before him morphed into a new one and he let out a tortured scream at what he saw before him. The gun clicked as the bullet was locked into place and Michael's mother smiled over at him. The barrel of the gun was aimed directly at Luke.

"No screaming, Michael,"

Michael clamped his mouth shut and covered it with his hands as his knees started to shake underneath him. Luke's gaze was locked with his, but it was evident the blonde was not afraid.

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