Till next time

Part 21

She kissed my cheeks and was quickly gone. I glanced at my phone and it had been 2 hours since I had last seen or spoken to James and he hadn't come to find me. I was in an obvious place but nothing. 

"Cecily hey."

"Hey whats up.

"I just wanted to apologise for what I said earlier it was really rude of me and.."

"I don't really care at all Amelia, James seems like he is changed but sometimes I don't think he is. He palmed me off to talk to Julia Roberts I mean whats that about."

I could feel my words slurring.

"Julia and James dated for a while, I heard he still goes to her when he has a new girl in mind. Approval I guess."

I began to feel a little of and I felt some manly hands grab my shoulders, the familiar irish accent graced my ears before I realised Amelia and Jamie were taking me back to there house.

The sun was strong in my eyes and I rolled over to stroke James's hair but the bed was empty. I sat up and didn't recognise where I was. I looked at the T-shirt and it had a Nirvana logo across it. I wondered out the room to be greeted by Amelia.

"Good morning sleepy head."

She was holding their daughter who was adorable and made me smile.

"I'm so embarrassed I am sorry for being a wreck last night. Cara and Kendall finished me off."

"I'm not surprised they are notorious well Cara is for being a good drinker."

We both laughed as I poured myself a coffee.

"Where is James."

"Er I am not sure I think Jamie has gone to pick him up."

"Pick him up?"

Amelia's face blushed a strong red colour again as if she said the wrong thing.

"Amelia?"

"I'm sure nothing happened but I think he might have stayed at Julia's house last night."

"Ah right ok."

I wondered into the bed room I had come from and closed the door behind me. I heard Amelia on the phone to Jamie saying she had put her foot in it or something. I didn't feel sad I felt used. The feeling made my stomach turn as I loved him and he acted as though I was no one last night. He didn't have to bring me if he didn't want to be seen with me and he definitely didn't have to stay with an ex. I remembered when I stayed with an ex and we had sex. It's an easy thing to do when you used to be in love with them. I grabbed my phone and saw so many notifications. I opened Instagram and saw I had 635K followers and hundreds of comments as Kendall and Cara had put the picture up of us on both of their accounts. Cara had written "Cecilly filling in the CaKe is the best" and Kendall had written "A CaKe kiss for this miss" I smiled before reposting saying "My Cake never tasted better." I clicked on to the internet and noticed an article about James. I saw the heading said James and Cecily no more? As I continued to scroll there was a picture of us together then one of James leaving with Julia. He was standing behind her covering his eyes. I was so embarrassed and hurt. I heard a knock on the door.

"Amelia I'm ok I am just going to try sleep a little.." My voice cracked through as the tears began to flow. The door creaked open and I saw James.

"No. Don't please. Just leave I am not ready to speak let alone look at you right now."

"Cecily please just come home with me we have to speak."

"Fine."

I pushed past him and grabbed my stuff and kissed Amelia and Jamie's cheeks and thanked them. James followed in silence.

"Let me take your stuff."

I ignored him and continued before getting into the car. 

"Cecily I am sorry."

"Ok."

"Let me explain myself please."

"Ok."

I didn't look at him or move my face from facing forward towards Toby one of James's drivers.

"Look what Amelia said was just a joke but I was embarrassed but when Julia came, well I'm sorry I got caught of guard and I was unbelievably rude to not introduce you and when you had to introduce yourself and she called you my squeeze I stood there when I should have defended you and you left and got drunk and needed me to take care of you and I wasn't there to do so and I am sorry and so angry at myself. I keep hurting you and I just.."

"Ok James. I agree we should end this."

"What? No Cecily don't be so brash I don't want that!"

"James you stayed over at Julia's house. Innocent or not how would you feel if I did that to you. And the countless amount of things you have done to upset me is just not worth it. I love you with my whole heart and I just let my guard down for someone and you've thrown it back in my face. I feel sick to my stomach any time another women speaks to you and I am nervous anytime you go out that you might not come home. Or the amount of fuck ups you've done I can't deal with anymore. I'm young and this shit is tiring."

"No please Cecily. I love you too much to let you go. I can't and I won't. Even if you break up with me I will not leave you alone I physically can't leave you alone."

"Toby pull over here please."

"Where are you going?"

"Cara and Kendall are staying here, I think I'll stay with them for a couple days until my flight home then I won't see you again."

"You're not being serious. This can't be over."

His eyes filled with tears and some fell down his cheeks. I reached my hand to wipe them away before pulling it back. I couldnt even touch him. He hurt me badly.

"Goodbye."

I closed the door before calling Cara who met me down stairs and brought me up. I began to cry and tell them both everything and they hugged and consoled me. I rang Amelia my best friend and told her everything who proceeded to cuss James out which made me feel better.

I woke up at midnight and looked at my phone, it was dark outside and I left onto the balcony. I lit a cigarette and inhaled deeply. I had several missed calls from James and texts.

'Cecily please come home I can't live without you."

"I'm an arsehole and I've really fucked up and I will do anything please just call me. I need to hear your voice."

I opened and didn't reply to them. I then received a text from a number that wasn't saved into my phone. 

'Hey Cecily, Cara gave me your number so I thought I'd message you. I heard you and James are over so I thought I'd ask you to dinner. If it's too soon I understand. Get back to me if your up for it. Chico x'

"Cara?"

"Yeh bub?"

She came bounding in and jumped on the bed.

"Who is Chico?"

A cheeky smiled crossed her face before she opened up google images of Chico Lachowski. I'd seen some of his modelling picture before he was beautiful.

"Look I know its early and he is willing to wait but he texted me about you before. Just go for one date and if its weird then don't do anything about it."

"I'll think about it. I still love James you know."

She kissed my head and cuddled me in the bed.

"I know hun. It's hard. I think you should go see James and see where both your heads are at."

I agreed before falling back asleep.