Bruises and scars. (Teacher/student love story)

34. Bruises and Scars.

FRIDAY

January the 21st.

I stayed home Wednesday and then the past two days we've had snow days. Lucky for me that means I haven't had to see Holden. Alex came over to check on me on Wednesday but the past two days I told him it was to dangerous to drive.

Today of course I went out of my house anyways and very carefully drove to Holdens. It's not like I can avoid him forever.

I sit in my car for a second after I shut it off trying to make it so cold that I'm forced to go inside. I can see my breathe before I get myself to open the door.

I step out of my car and roll my shoulders trying to unfreeze my body and to get the courage to do this.

I take a deep breathe and it's so cold it burns my lungs. I lick my lips and they immediately dry and I feel them chapping over.

I force myself to walk towards the building and I seem to take forever to get up the stairs. The whole way my heart is racing.

I honestly have no idea what I'm going to say to him yet. I just know that I need to take back what I said. I can't complicate things more than they already are. I'm engaged to Alex and I can't let myself have these feelings for Holden.

Besides it's not even legal for me to like Holden, he's my teacher! Not that that has ever stopped us before.

I get upstairs and am right in front of Holdens door. For some reason I find myself bouncing in place and shaking my arms like I'm getting ready for a fight. Maybe in a way I am. I know that he's not going to let me go as easy as I want him too.

My heart is in my mouth when I finally get myself to open the door without knocking. I've just gone in before so I'm not afraid too anymore. And I doubt Holden will care.

Here goes absolutely everything.

HOLDENS POV

I wake up to someone playing with my ear and I smile, " Scarlete, stop." I say laughing. I cover my ear with my hand and turn onto my stomach.

Someone runs their hand down my back and I shiver, "Stop. You're making me-"

"Please don't finish that sentence." I hear an Irish accent say.

I turn so fast that I knock our heads together.

"Jeez Holden what are you trying to do?"

I sit up, "You didn't need to scare me like that!"

She rolls her eyes, "I've been here for three days you would think you would remember it was me and not Scarlete by now."

She's wearing a pair of my boxers again and a button up shirt. The clothes that apparently she's decided make nice pajamas. Only today it's unbuttoned and she's only wearing a bra underneath, "Jeesh El. Cover up."

She rolls her eyes but buttons a middle button- which does absolutely nothing.

Ellie was supposed to go back home yesterday but the snow was so bad she was forced to stay. Now she's staying until Tuesday.

She lies down next to me, "What are we doing today?"

I shrug and poke her side, "I dunno. We could go see Scarlete."

Ellie shakes her head and sighs, "Holden I know that she said that she loved you but you got to give her time to sort everything out. She'll come to you when she's ready."

I sigh, "What if she never comes to me?"

She rolls onto her side and smiles at me, "Well I'm sure you'll think of some stupid reason to keep her after school."