Useless and Hopeless

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Dedicated to phanthing1

I hate going to school. Mostly because I know I can't afford it. I'm tired of taking handouts. At least I don't have to provide for anyone else. Well, execpt this stray puppy I found a while back. I run my fingers through my auburn hair. It's Wednesday and I still need to feed myself and Butterball, my dog. I check the clock and it's 6:45. I'll be late if I don't leave soon. I decide to skip breakfast for myself. I grab my backpack and keys, hooking Butterball up to a leash, and walking her to my neighbor's house. Ms. Anderson opened the door. "Running late again, aren't we, Chris?" I smile. Ms. Anderson is and elderly lady who lives next to my apartment. "You know me too well, Ms. Anderson." She hands me an apple and a small bottle of apple juice. "Thank you. I'm sorry to have to trouble you all the time." She smiles and laughs. "Oh please. I buy these things especially for you. Now, would you like a ride?" "If it wouldn't be too much trouble." She ruffles my hair. "Nonsense. I'll just have my youngest grandson feed Butterball. I need to take my eldest grandson to school too. Do you mind? I know you don't get along very well." I sigh. It's not that we don't get along...we're just two different types of people. I'm a...nerd. He's a jock. Mr. Popularity. "It's not a problem, Ms. Anderson. I promise not to nerd out on him." Ms. Anderson laughs, her sweet elderly laugh. "I wish you would rub off on him. He's too focused on sports and girls." "Grandma, who are you talking to?" Ms. Anderson moves out of the way of the door. Behind her is Jacob. He's about two feet taller than me, he has dirty blonde hair and blue eyes that you could stare at for hours. I force myself to look away. There's no use in obtaining a hopeless crush on him, its not like we're ever going to speak again. "Oh I was just offering to take Chris, the young boy from across the way, to school since he's running a bit late. You don't mind do you?" Jacob rolls his eyes. "No, Grandma. It's fine. As long as his nerd doesn't rub off on me." He said 'nerd' like it was the plague. That kind of stung. While Ms. Anderson scolds him for being rude, I kneal down to eye level with my pup. "You be good, alright Butterball?" She barks. "I'll be back around four thirty. Maybe six if I get," I clear my throat, "'held up.' I'll try to bring you back a snack, okay girl?" She barks again, this time with a wag of her tail. I pull her into a hug. She calms down and whimpers slightly. I know she'll miss me. She always does this when she doesn't want me to go. I release her and stand up. "If I don't make it back from this one, stay with Ms. Anderson. She'll find you a good home." It was then that I realized that Ms. Anderson, Jacob, and even his little brother, Evan, were listening to me talk to my dog. Great. My nerd factor just skyrocketed. At least I didn't make her talk back...this time. I awkwardly scratched the back of my head, heat rising to my face. "Um...I uh...sorry. Can we go now?" Ms. Anderson smiles at me and ruffles my hair. "You're so cute sometimes, Chris! Isn't he, Jacob?" "Yeah, adorable. Can we please go now, Grandma?" His voice was dripping in sarcasm, but I felt my face heat up more. I dipped my head down and waited for Ms. Anderson and Jacob to leave the house. Evan runs out as well, screaming, "SHOTGUN!" Jacob rolls his eyes. He opens the door to the backseat, but doesn't get in. I look up curiously, only to find him glaring at me with an annoyed expression on his face. "Are you getting in or what, nerd?" I nod and quickly slip into the backseat. He pushes me all the way to the other window, climbing in after me. I rub my achy shoulder. He's definitely the football captain for a reason. I think I let out a small whimper, because next thing I knew, he grabbed my arm (surprisingly softly, I might add) and pulled my sleeve up to my shoulder. I yelped a bit, quite surprised since I'm wearing long sleeves. "What the-? H-hey! Cut that o-out! Y-you're going t-to stretch out my shirt!" He ignores me and looks at my arm a bit too intensely. He suddenly pulls away and rolls his eyes. "You're fine. Weak, very weak, but fine." I pout slightly. "Gee, I'm gushing with gratitude." I say, sarcastically. He snorts and leans forward, talking to his brother. I turn my head towards the window, letting out a quiet sigh. Evan turns around and grins...at me. "Hey Chris!" I wave slightly. "Hello Evan. How are you?" "Good! I was wondering if you wanted to trade pokemon later?" I tense up. Damn it. My nerd is coming out. "Yeah! I just got Kyogre, Xernes, and Yvetyl. I haven't got Groudon yet, though. I also have..." and there I go. Nerding out when I said I wouldn't. I'm just rambling now. Just from him suggesting we trade pokemon. I pause in my ramble, noticing that Jacob seems annoyed. I apologize and look down at my lap. Evan whines. "Awwh! Why'd you stop, Chris? I want to hear more!" Ms. Anderson nods. "I agree. You seemed very happy about the topic. It'd be nice to see that more often." I sigh slightly. "I was irritating Jacob. I promised I wouldn't nerd out but I just did." I stay silent the rest of the ride, as do they. Once there, we exit the car. Jacob ruffles his brother's hair and gives his grandmother a kiss on the cheek. How sweet. I turn to leave, but Evan calls out to me. "Hey, Chris? Can I talk to you real quick?" I walk over to Evan's window. I hear Ms. Anderson tell Jacob to wait for me. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. Evan yanks me by the collar, so I'm hanging partly in the window. I'm completely embarrassed. I mean, what if someone sees me? Evan leans close and 'whispers' into my ear. "Jakey was annoyed at himself, not you. He hates how he has no idea what we're talking about. He wants to be a good big brother, trying to bond with me, but we have completely different interests. Please, offer to help my brother. Even if he rejects your help, he'll come back and ask for it again." I smile and nod. "Okay. Bye Evan, be good and take care of Butterball. Bye Ms. Anderson." I remove myself from the window and turn, waving. I notice Jacob actually waited, and that his face is slightly red. I look around and see some girls sending flirtatious looks at him. I sigh. Useless crush on a hopeless jock. I start walking, surprisingly Jacob follows me. I slow down slightly. "Hey, um...Jacob..?" I decided to ask him if he wanted my assistance in understanding a nerd's mindset. "What nerd?" I flinch. "My name is Chris. Anyways, I was wondering if you wanted me to explain pokemon to you..?" He turns eagerly towards me and is about to answer, when he pauses. I turn my head slightly and see his 'posse'. I'm pretty sure I hear him say he's sorry before I'm on the ground, holding my bruised cheek. I feel tears well up in my eyes. He punched me. He spits in my direction and leads his goons in a different direction, never once looking back. I was stupid to think for even a second that we would get along. Why would I think he would apologize for being a stereotypical jock? I spit out the small amount of blood that collected in my mouth and wipe my eyes of the tears that shouldn't be there. I guess it's hard getting punched in the face by a guy you have a crush on. I walk to my locker and grab my necessary things. I walk to History and set my books down at my seat. Before I could sit down, Beck, my best friend, pulls me over my desk. I have to prop myself up on his desk, the one right behind mine. "What happened to your face?!" I chuckle and push his face away from mine. "I'm fine, just locker difficulties." I stand up straight and turn around. I'm shocked to find Jacob behind me, face red. I turn and see a group of girls walking away from him, giggling. I resist the urge to roll my eyes and sit in my desk. Jacob walks closer to my desk, but before he can speak, our teacher, Mr. Rodney, entered the room.

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