016 | Newt

1.8K 191 7
                                    

Dearest Tommy,

Congratulations on growing a pair of balls! That's good news on my part, because now I can tell Minho that not all WCKD kids are ball-less slintheaded shanks.

I'm glad you made an effort to make a statement on Teresa. Girls like it better when you make your intentions clear (majority of them, that is). Now, leave all the planning to me, and we'll get yourself a Barbie Doll girlfriend in no time.

On another note, I have to know what kind of person this Teresa chick is. You're not giving me much information when you're obsessing with her. Maybe you should try giving me a few of her likes and dislikes, so that I could make up a plan for the two of you. (One that doesn't involve condoms. Jesus Christ, Tommy. What are you, a dog in heat?)

'Till then, try not to screw yourself over when you're around her, because nobody ever wants to go out with a sore loser.

Yours sincerely,
Newt

YOURS SINCERELY • newtmas auWhere stories live. Discover now