When I Die

Chapter 16

We pulled into the driveway. Dad came to my side of the car to help me take the tank out. He told me to head to the porch as he grabbed the two replacable tanks from the trunk.

Getting tired from lugging the heavy cart, I decided to sit down on the front steps of the porch. As I sat I saw Jared heading towards me, walking through the front yard. His eyes widening when he saw the tank.

"Isn't it beautiful?" I said in a joking matter as he sat down beside me.

"It is." He said and gave me a kiss on the top of my head. "You kind of look like Hazel Grace."

"I've never been told that before." I said with a chuckle.

"Does it feel weird?"

I nodded. "Very."

We paused for a second before I continued.

"Jared." I stuttered out. "We need to explain something to you."

I and Jared sat on the couch, hand in hand, as my Dad sat in the recliner across from the couch.

"This is pretty tough to explain." My Dad said, folding his hands onto his lap.

"What is it?" Jared wanted to know. His voice becoming rough.

My Dad took a deep breath before continuing. "It's much worst than we thought."

"What's that mean?" Jared said, shaking his head gently.

"It's going to happen sooner than we expected." Dad replied.

Jared's eyes started to shine with water showing that he was on the verge of crying. "How long?" His voice came out raspy.

My Dad took another deep breath, knowing it's hard to tell people this. "A couple months."

Jared squeezed my hand harder. "How long exactly?"

"After a month it could happen any time. We just don't know when yet. We'll know later on."

Jared's lips began to curl. I could see he was trying hard not to cry. I put my hand on his thigh and rubbed it, trying the calm him down but all he did was take my hand off his thigh and brought it to his lips and kissed it before putting it back on his thigh, keeping a hand on it the whole time.

My Dad stood up. "I'm going to leave you alone. I need to file some papers." Dad walked out of the living room to the den and left us both sitting on the couch with our thoughts.

Jared took a deep breath. "I can't believe this." He said, tears making his cheeks all wet. He picked up one of the three water bottles that my Dad placed on the coffee table for all of us. He took a swig but soon started to burst in tears, spitting water out of his mouth as he started to cough. I moved closer and rubbed his back.

"Shh." I tried to sooth him.

"I should've listened." He said in almost a whisper as if he was talking to himself. His hands clasped together on his lap as he just stared at them.

"What do you mean?" I continued to rub his back.

He slowly turned his head to face me. "You told me not to fall in love with you."

I quickly put my arms around him as he did the same and we squeezed tightly into a hug, rocking slowly side to side. I rested my chin on his shoulder as he rest his head behind me. Tears were burning my eyes as Jared's river of tears soaked my shirt.

"I'm so sorry." I said and rocked him. "But I'm glad you fell in love with me."

He swallowed. "Me too." He placed a hand in my hair, squeezing me like if he didn't I would run away or just drift away from him.