When I Die

Chapter 9

I found myself on Facebook, looking at Jared's profile. Seeing posts from his friends saying how much they missed him and stuff. I opened up his photos and looked through them. Seeing pictures of him with a large group of friends and some at family gatherings. I especially paid attention to his indiviual photos. He had pictures taken of him in front of monuments and beaches and oceans, some photos he took of himself chilling in his old room.

I kept Facebook open as I opened another tab, leading me to google.

I typed in the search bar "Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy." I wanted to learn more and see if there was any information about a cure. There wasn't. I already knew there wasn't a cure so I didn't get my hopes up. But I was still disappointed that I couldn't find anything on the subject. I ended up looking at diagrams of a normal heart and next to it is a Hypertrophic heart. I ended up also googling the survival rate of a teenager with Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy. But all I found out was that only 10% of American children are dianosed with HCM. I am so unlucky. That's 1 in every 100,000 in the U.S. dianosed before 18.

I can't bear to look at the facts anymore. I was about the close my laptop when I was stopped with the text tone coming from my phone. I looked at my phone, seeing a text from Jared. I quickly shut my laptop close and sat up on my bed, reading the text message.

I'm bored. Can I come over?

I smiled as I read his text, hearing it in his voice. I thought about what the answer should be, biting my lip as I thought and ended up texting him:

Sure. Is it okay with your parents?

He answered about half a minute later.

I just told them that I wanted to get out of the house for awhile. I'll explain everything to you soon.

I texted: See you soon.

He replied: See you soon. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

I smiled, swearing I was blushing and relied: Diddo that.

I left my window opened so he could climb in and I didn't have to get up.

I layed on my bed as he carefully pulled himself up to the window and came inside, almost tripping.

"Hey." He said as he regained focus.

"Hey."

He came and sat with me on the bed, giving me a kiss on the cheek. "Mom and Dad are in a heated argument right now about something I don't know or care about."

"What about Tommy?" I asked.

"I dropped him off at a friend's house. I explained the situation to the parents and they agreed to watch him til' I come and get him."

I nodded. "Good for you."

He turned to me. "Now let's talk."

"About what?"

"About us." He said, gesturing his hands back and forth at us. "Are we a thing or something?"

I nodded. "Yeah. If you want."

He smiled. "I want."

"That's good cause' I want that to." We smiled at eachother before the thought came to my head. "This isn't suppose to happen."

He put a hand on my back and started rubbing it. "What?"

"Us. I told you I was going to hurt you and that's exactly what I'm doing."

He made me look at him. "Hey, hey. I want to be your first and last love. Yes, I am going to be in a lot of pain when-" He pause, not wanting to say it. "But me knowing that I made your time special is what I will hold onto. I want you to go happy, knowing you lived a full life. So, trust me. I don't mind. Hurt me. Nothing would hurt me more than knowing you never found true love. Knowing you didn't feel the pleasure of being in love. I like you, okay. Like really, really like you. We just have to take it one day at a time and we'll get through the rough patches... together." He wrapped an arm around me, squeezing onto my shoulder.