With Blood shall come Desire (MxM)

☽ Chapter Thirty Three ☾

𝕬ristaeus only watched him with soft eyes. This was peace. It was perfect. Just when Aristaeus felt his eyes dropping, he shook himself up again. The god shouldn't even be this exhausted, he hadn't fought a battle today. "Silthos?" He pushed himself off the edge and carefully swam towards the other god. It looked truly beautiful and scary at the same time to see the water swallow him like that.

Silthos didn't hear him and just kept floating in the water with his eyes closed. This moment felt magical.
"Silth-" When Aristaeus tried to reach out to him, a cold hand pulled him back. "Shh.", Death whispered, sending goosebumps through his skin. "Doesn't he look so perfect laying there?" As fast as the illusion of Death had come did it go and Aristaeus was left mortified with the cruel image of Silthos being dead. Aristaeus would see him bleeding and taking his last breath. And there would be nothing he could do. No being could change this fate and the god of war would have to live the rest of his eternal life without Silthos. He would never get to wake up next to him, to love and cherish him and it would destroy Aristaeus. During the nights they have spent together, the god had imagined a life with Silthos. He wanted to take him on dates, just as the humans did. He wanted to gift him flowers that would make his eyes lit up and do anything in his power to keep him happy.  But with the years he will forget Silthos' smile, his voice and his beautiful eyes. There would be nothing left for him that would make life worth living, because Aristaeus' soul would die with his lover. The fear struck him and made every wall crumble. It had been so difficult for him to hold everything together, but time was not stopping and with every second the inevitable became more and more real.

Silthos noticed the eyes of Aristaeus on him and stood up again. His heart twitched as he saw the fear and anxiety glimmering in his face. "Aris..." He slowly walked to him. "I'm here... What's haunting your mind?"
Aristaeus quickly blinked and looked down. His hands were balled to fists as he tried to calm his mind and body. This was hard for him. Managing his feelings, managing this impossible fear that took over him completely. "I'm- It's fine, it's nothing." The god swallowed hard and didn't meet Silthos' eyes.

"You are not okay, stop lying to me." Silthos repeated his last words more softly: "Please don't lie to me..." He stepped closer and laid his hand on his cheek, carefully stroking it. "It's okay for you to feel something overwhelming. It's okay. It's alright that you are feeling like this."
Aristaeus instinctively leaned into the touch and furrowed his brows in sorrow. He hadn't even noticed the first tears escaping, until he felt them on his cheeks. "Shit.", he whispered and immediately wiped them away, only for new ones to follow. "Gods, I'm sorry." Aristaeus turned away from him to wipe his tears. He didn't want Silthos to see him this weak. Aristaeus was supposed to be the strong one, the one to protect him. He didn't want to burden the god any more.

"Aristaeus... hey... Aristaeus look at me." Silthos decided not to pressure him and just wrapped his arms around him from behind. "It's okay... let it out: Cry, scream or be silent. Everything you want." He kissed his neck softly. "I'm here... I'm here.", he whispered gently.

Aristaeus was a wreck. His mind didn't stop imagining Silthos, dead, bloody and looking at him with lifeless eyes. But the fact that he was still here, caressing him gently and caring for him made it hurt even more. Not one sound escaped his lips, but his shoulders were trembling, trying to hold everything in. Aristaeus couldn't do it in anymore. He turned towards the other god and wrapped his arms around him. As long as he could he would hold him close.

"Shh... let it all out... cry as much as you want..." Silthos gently rubbed over his back and felt his eyes burning. His throat became tight as well. "I'm still here with you. I'm glad to be with you...", his voice crackled and he held the other god tightly. There was just them, bathing in the universe, holding each other tightly to save themselves from drowning.