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'Cause it's been another perfect day with ya, Wanna lay with ya, spend the night with ya. Spend my life with you, alright..
Jhené Aiko: "While We're Young."
Beep, Beep. The antagonizing sound of the hospital's monitors rang like bells through Ashley's head. Her eyes fixated on the lavender vase that sat on top of the tan colored table.
Next to the table, lying on the cold, hard hospital bed laid Ermias. He'd just been declared brain dead, and Ashley's world came crashing down. Sitting next to her, sat a weary Asia. She knew she had to bury her first born son, and the thought alone made her sick to her stomach.
It wasn't long before the churning feeling traveled from her stomach, to her throat. Clutching her abdomen, Asia sprinted towards the confined bathroom. Hurling up every last bite of her caesar salad she'd ate prior, the thought of her grand baby crossed her mind.
Ashley was a wonderful woman, whom loved her son dearly. She now had to experience life as a single mother, and technically a widow. That poor baby. Flashed through Asia's mind. She heaved over the toilet, as she tried to process the thoughts of: her son being dead, her grand baby being born soon with out a father, and Ashley.
Another person crossed her mind, some one that needed Ermias more than he needed himself. Ezriah. She knew her son wouldn't be able to live without his brother, his wisdom, his guidance, his loyalty, his love.
While Asia hovered over the toilet seat, Sulking about how Ermias' death affected everyone around her—she didn't even have time to think about how it would affect her.
Ermias was her first born son, he was her first love. He taught her so much, she appreciated him beyond measure.
Ash, you okay?
How's the baby?
You'll get through this.. God always has the final say.
Ashley could just hear the antagonizing voices of her family, and friends. She knew they were only going to try to console her, and be there for her—but she knew she'd never be okay. No words, nor motivational speeches could bring her child's father, the love of her life back.
Unable to move her limbs, Ashley stared at the cream colored hospital walls as the heart monitor beeped alongside Nipsey. The sound made her skin crawl, Ermias' heart was still beating, yet some how he wasn't alive.
He was alive, but he wasn't Ermias. He was just a body, without a brain, without a soul.
The sound of her mother-in-law vomiting in the next room didn't even register to Ashley. Her mind felt blank, her now pale hand rested on top of her baby bump. The nerves in her spine tickled, tears fell as the dry lump she felt in her throat came out as a mangled cry.
