Abhinav

Part 36 - Understanding

'..And then Dida said that you will forg..forg..forget me, Papa!', Abhir barely spoke a sentence without weeping. Abhinav's heart kept breaking but he had to know the truth, otherwise he wouldn't be able to help Abhir.
'Bas Aara! Stop crying!', said Abhinav, hugging Abhir to him. Abhinav had understood the whole matter now. Not a day or night of peace was possible thanks to Manjari and Abhimanyu. Abhinav wanted to feel rage but he just felt disgusted. Who treated a six year boy like that much less their own blood? Abhir had just come out of a terrible ordeal with the kidnapping and demolition but all the Birlas cared about was what they wanted. Abhinav caught his train of thoughts. Akshara and he would deal with the Birlas later, Abhir needed him right now.

'Nikkeji, listen to Papa carefully, okay? Some things are going to be difficult to understand, it should be discussed when you are older, more mature but..we will try to understand it right now. Okay?'.
Abhir looked up at Abhinav and slowly nodded.
'Abhir, Papa is and never was mad. Dida is mistaken. Papa couldn't come the first two weekends as Papa was unwell. Remember when I fell sick in Kasauli and you prayed for me?'.
Abhir caught Abhinav's hand tightly in fear.
'Yes, Papa! You were very sick and I was very scared. Mumma too. Papa, are you okay now? Why didn't anyone tell me? I would pray and take care of you, Papa'.

Abhinav ruffled Abhir's hair affectionately.
'Nikkeji, I was very sick but I didn't know it. Because last time in Kasauli, my body was wounded. I could see it, recognise it and approach a Doctor. This time, my mind was wounded. Your Mumma was very brave and smart and supportive. She recognised that I was not feeling well, called the Doctor and she and our entire Goenka family helped me get better. That time, when my body was unwell, I didn't recover in a day, right Abhir? It took weeks..'
'Yes, Papa. I remember'.
'..Same here, Aara. I am much, much better but it will take some time to fully recover..', Abhinav pulled out his emergency medicines from his shirt pocket, '..See, these are my prescribed emergency medicines. If I feel unwell, I will have them and then call the Doctor and then my recovery will continue'.

Abhir wasn't completely reassured.
'Papa, Papa, you didn't.. you didn't..recognise me just now when I came in the room. You said, Nikkeji is fine. You asked me to leave'.
Abhinav wiped the fresh tears flowing from Abhir's face. He had to over simply to make Abhir understand the truth and remove the unnecessary fears overtaking him.

'Nikkeji, you know how when you dream, that feels like the reality and only when you wake up, you realise it was a dream. Yes? Exactly, Aara! When Dr. Birla won your custody and you had to live with him, I didn't know how to live without you, Nikkeji. How can Abhir's Papa live without Abhir? But I didn't have the power to bring you back to me. So, in a way, I started dreaming that you were with me all the time. I was.. dreaming without sleeping and so I couldn't wake up. Abhir, when you grow up, you will learn about all this in the right way and understand it correctly. For now, the only way I can explain is that I mixed up dreams with reality and that was not healthy for me. Like I said, your Mumma saved me. I am following the Doctor's treatment and in some time I will be fully healed. Today, I wasn't sure whether you were my dream or not and I am so sorry I hurt you, Nikkeji. Papa is sorry'.
Abhinav caught his ears but Abhir tugged them away, shaking his head.

'You being here at night confused me and I know I hurt you with what I said. But Nikkeji today, I am very upset with you! Why did you run away again? How many times have Akshara and I explained to you how dangerous it is to be alone at night? Nikkeji, that day when I had a car accident and my phone battery had run out, you were so worried you had made me promise that I would always keep my phone charged. Should I behave reckless and break my promise, Aara?'.
Abhinav didn't want to bring this up, considering everything Abhir had gone through in such a short time but this was more important to his safety than everything Mrs. Birla had told him.
'Sorry, Papa! I had to meet you, Papa! I couldn't let you forget me forever!'.
'Nikkeji, why didn't you call me? Where's the cellphone Mumma and I gave you? Why didn't you approach Aarohi Masi? I was coming tomorrow to play with you again. Why couldn't you wait, Nikkeji?'.
Abhir bowed, regretful.

Abhinav softened inwardly but he knew he had to stop this dangerous habit.
'Nikkeji, just like you want me to be with you always, I want that too. For that, you have to keep yourself safe. All of us are trying to protect you but if you won't help us then we won't be able to be together'.
Abhir solemnly said,'I won't run away again, Papa. Promise! This was the last time'.
Abhinav breathed a sigh of relief.
'Nikkeji, ek pahadi apna waada kabhi nahi bhulta ji. Remember this..'.

There was a knock on the door.
'Come!', called out Abhinav.
Muskaan entered.
'Muskaan, you know you don't need to knock'.
'Didn't want to disturb you and Abhir, Bhai ji. Aarohi ji called and said that the Birlas are sound asleep. You can drop Abhir to Birla Mansion now. No one will know, Abhir won't be in any trouble, Aarohi ji will handle the security guards as well'.
Abhinav felt a slight sinking in his heart and saw Abhir's face drop as well.
'Bhai ji, we can't keep Abhir here without permission! Especially after the way the Birlas behaved with you and..', said Muskaan, reading Abhinav's reluctance on his face correctly.
Abhinav shot an anxious glance at Muskaan. Abhir wasn't aware of the intense arguments that had taken place.
'Bhai ji..', said Muskaan, coaxingly, wanting for Abhinav to not get into a demeaning tussle with the Birlas again.
'Muskaan, they didn't even come to know Abhir is missing. Just one night. I will drop him off to school tomorrow. No one will even realise. Please, Muskaan, please, ple..'.
'Okay, okay! Stubborn Nikkeji and his stubborn Papa. Only Akshara Bhabhi can make this Papa - Beta understand anything. I will tell Aarohi ji. After that, whatever happens, happens. Don't count on me for help', huffed Muskaan, backing out of the room, inwardly happy that Abhinav and Abhir could spend more time together.
'Thanks, Muskaan!', called out Abhinav as Muskaan shut the door behind her.

'Nikkeji, do you believe what BuMi just said? That she wouldn't help us?'.
Abhir grinned,'Never! BLU'.
'Ouija! Abbreviations again! I know blue is BLUE but what is BLU?'.
'Papa, it is so easy. BuMi loves us!'.
'Easy? Shaitaan ka bacha! Ouija! That means I am shaitaan! No, no! Abhinav ka bacha, come here! Where are you running?'
Abhir laughed and danced out of Abhinav's reach.
'We will make a Thank You card tomorrow for Muskaan, okay? Now, stop playing and come to sleep. It's after 12:00 and you have to go to school tomorrow'.

'Papa, I will stay with you tonight!', said Abhir, happily, clinging to Abhinav again.
'And I will stay with my Nikkeji!', said Abhinav, equally happy.

'Nikkeji, before we sleep, you said about mad men being in the road and people mocking them and all.. Those were the times when we weren't aware about how the mind can also get unwell. Now, we know better, we have better medicines and technologies. So, it with the correct medical care, that is not the only outcome. That won't happen to me because I wasn't so ill to begin with and I received the right care at the right time. If however you ever seen anyone in such a condition, don't mock them, okay? Don't look down on them. The least we can do is be compassionate, right Nikkeji?'.
'Papa, I never mock anyone. Not in school, not in football grounds, not anywhere. I don't like it, Papa'.

Abhinav kissed Abhir's forehead.
'My good boy. You are not scared anymore of me forgetting you or leaving you, are you?'.
'No, Papa. I know that you never forgot me. You were sick before and now you are getting fine'.

'Aara, about the sibling matter Dida brought up. I love you unconditionally, Abhir. I first became Papa because of Abhir. The Abhinav I am today is largely because of you. You will never be secondary to anyone in my life. No one can ever replace you'.
'I know, Papa. Sorry, I doubted you. I got scared'.
'It's natural, Nikkeji. I am proud of you for speaking to me freely about this. You know now that no matter what the issue, you can approach Akshara and me about it. We won't judge you, will only help you'.

'Nikkeji, your Dida will most probably ask you tomorrow whether you are not worried for my health or not scared of being replaced or something like that. Don't tell her about visiting me, otherwise along with you, BuMi and Aarohi Masi will also fall in trouble. Tell her that Abhinav has his whole family to take care of him and that parents do not replace their kids'.
'Yes, Papa'.

'Now, my Nikkeji, GN and SD! Haha! It means..'
Abhir put his hand on his forehead, 'Good Night and Sweet Dreams!'
'Wah, Nikkeji! You are so smart. Just like your Papa. I always used to think that Abhir should be intelligent like me, otherwise..'
'I will call and tell Mumma this just now..'.
'.. otherwise, he will be even smarter like his Mumma. That's what I meant. Why you want your Mumma to come in Sher..Heerni mode..'.
'I will tell Mumma everything tomorrow', said Abhir, with a naughty gleam in his eyes.
Abhinav kissed the top of his head and pulled the comforters over them. They drifted off to sleep peacefully, like they would in Sharma Home in Kasauli.