Affairs of the Heart

17

"I messed up Dad" Ben sighed sitting across from his father

"Well Ben, that you did" His dad nodded "You have gotten yourself in a predicament"

"I had two amazing women and now what do I have? A mess on my hands. What am I going to do"

"I thought you grew out of this reckless phase Ben"

"Yeah I know" Ben rubbed his face "Everything just kind of happened"

"Let me ask you something, son. This other woman. Do you love her"

"I do" He nodded

"Then why did you stay with Katrina and even show up to the wedding? Hell why was there a wedding"

"Because" He sighed "I didn't want to hurt anyone"

"Son, that's dumb. You're hurt. Miranda is hurt and Katrina is hurt. Now you're telling me Katrina is having your baby"

"Yes" He nodded

"So Ben tell me how an affair wasn't going to hurt anyone"

"I don't know Dad" He sighed "I just thought"

"Wrong" He cut him off "You ain't do no types of thinking. Or at least not the good kind of thinking"

"How do I fix this"

"Ben, you are a grown man. You made this mess. Fix this mess."

"Dad I am trying"

"You are sitting in my kitchen complaining about everything. Giving excuses. I have two kids in this world. And you know I am prouder of you both but right now Ben I am disappointed. And it's not just the fact you cheated. It's the fact that all the mess could have been avoided if you just used the brains in that doctor's head of yours. Your neighbor was worth it for you to cheat on Katrina. The woman who you asked to marry you"

"Yes Dad, Miranda was worth it"

"Benjamin. You stayed with Katrina. You did all that to be with Miranda and stayed with Katrina. You're selfish Ben. That is selfish. You aren't in college sleeping with roommates. You are a grown man. In your 20s you had immaturity to fall back on but in your 30s, you just weren't thinking. And I hear you say you want to be with Miranda"

"I do"

"Words are words Ben unless you act. And your actions told her that you didn't. You talk a good talk about how you love her but nothing you did said love. An affair is not love. Sleeping with her and then going home to be with Katrina is not love. You don't act like you love her. You took her for granted"

"Her husband took her for granted" Ben got defensive

"And what did you do Ben" His dad eyed him "You loved her but kept her on your side while you stayed engaged. She had to sit back and watch you be with Katrina"

"She picked her husband Dad. That first night we got together I was ready to throw it away and she picked her husband. She wanted to make her marriage work. I was devastated but I let her go. I tried to fix me and Katrina but it was too late in my heart. I love Miranda and I screwed up by not breaking up with Katrina. I get it. I was selfish I get it. But I was afraid to leave and Miranda decided that she wasn't as in love with me as she thought or something. I was afraid she'd go back to Tucker so I held on to Katrina. And when I found out that Miranda was divorced, I was ready to go all in but then a part of me told me it was wrong to leave Katrina. We built something together and I was too afraid to tear it down"

"Until you thought Miranda could've been dead"

"I shouldn't have done all that I did and I acknowledge that. But this has been eye-opening"