Affairs of the Heart

5

Miranda's heart was racing and her ears were ringing. She couldn't believe this was happening to her. Why her? Why her baby? And why couldn't her husband be man enough to admit what he had done? He got into her head. She began to question her ability to be a mother. Was this her fault after all? She began to quietly recount that morning going step by step

" I left it on the desk, I went through the office door, and I closed the gate. I walked from the bedroom to the office. I wrote a note to the building manager. I left it on the desk. I was in a hurry so I looked at the clock and I walked out of the door. I... The gate..."

Derek noticed her and walked to her to comfort her. He couldn't imagine what she was going through. He wondered why her husband wasn't in here with her. He sat down and heard what she was whispering to herself. " This isn't helping" He sighed

" It was open. Did I close the gate? Damn it" She ignored him and just kept racking her brain. Was she really the one who left it open?

" This isn't helping." He repeated trying to break her from this

" I walked out of the bedroom into the office, and I wrote a note"

"This isn't helping. Stop this." He didn't want her to continue to beat herself up. He knew Miranda was a wonderful mother. She didn't deserve to keep sitting here alone going over this over and over

" I can't remember. I can't remember if I closed that gate. That's my baby. I can't remember if I closed it. " She said in tears

"It doesn't matter" He softly spoke to her wanting to comfort her but unsure if his words meant anything to her

"It does matter! It matters because I'm his mother, I can't have done this to him. I can't have hurt him so badly."

"You didn't do this." Things just happen.

"No, they don't just happen." She shouted "Things don't just happen. People make decisions. People prioritize. Okay, the world just doesn't happen! Okay, it's not on God. It's on me or it's on Tucker"

"Stop it! Stop. Stop." He hated this for her. He knew nothing he could say could make her not feel guilty but he had to try

" It's on me"

"No, stop it. Just stop it" He grabbed her and just held her as she cried. This was the best he could do for her right now " You're a good mother. Tucker is a good father. You love your baby. People make mistakes. You didn't do this to your son, and neither did your husband"

Once she calmed down some he left her again. As he was leaving Ben saw her.

"Miranda" He ran in

"Ben" She looked at him with surprise

"How are you, how is Tuck? God, I've been so worried about the both of you. I have been in the waiting room trying to respect your privacy and the fact that Tucker was here but then Callie said that he wasn't even telling the whole truth and I just" He sighed and wrapped his arms around her " I need you both to be okay"

"Ben" She sighed

"I know I put you in a tough spot. But I have grown so attached to you and Tuck. We're friends. I'd say you're my best friend and I can't not have you in my life. We live next door to each other and we just understand each other. Men and women can be friends and we're good friends. I appreciate this connection and the connection I have with your son. I need us to be okay again. I need a friend and so do you" He sighed "Friends"

"Friends" She smiled "Thank you for saving my son"

"How is he do you know" He asked

"Extensive damage. His stomach's in his chest. A ruptured diaphragm. the force of the trauma injured his thoracic aorta."