Chapter 3

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Friday couldn't come any faster. I had never wanted to go to school so much in my life. I had to carry another bag around all day for my extra clothes. Right after school, Spencer, Brendon, and I were going to walk back to Brendon's house to take his dad's car to the bowling alley.

At lunch, it was all Brendon could talk about.

"Ry, you didn't need to bring your bag to school, you know? We could have stopped by your house to get it after."

"It's fine, it'll save us the trouble." The "trouble" that is my father.

After lunch I had chemistry and history, both of which were very boring, besides the point that Brendon is my lab partner and we get to sit next to each other.

I meet with Brendon and Spencer when the bell rings. The first few minutes of the walk are quiet until Spencer finally starts a conversation.

"So Brendon, any girlfriends back home?" At the question, Brendon gets a little nervous.

"Um, not really."

"Why not?" Is Spencer trying to make him uncomfortable?

"The girls weren't, uh, my type?" He says as more of a question.

"Do you mean...Like that? Or literally?" Spencer digs deeper.

"Because it's okay with us. If you are, I mean." I assure Brendon. He seems more relieved when I say that.

"Uh, yeah. I am." He nods shyly. Spencer elbows me slightly. But just enough for Brendon to see.

Dammit Spencer.

He looks away, as if to shake off what he just saw. While he's not looking, I stomp on Spencer's foot.

"Ow!" He yells.

"Sorry." I smile sweetly. He gives me the evil eye.

We walk up to Brendon's front porch. He opens the door and closes it behind us.

"We're home mom! I'm gonna grab the keys and we'll be out!" He yells out indirectly through the house to his mom as we follow him up the stairs. He opens the first door on the left and motions for us to come in.

"You can just set your bag on my bed, Ry." I plop my bag on his unmade bed.

"Brenny? Where'd you go?" A higher voice yells. I stifled my laugh, but Spencer didn't hold back. Brendon gave Spencer an annoyed look with a red face.

"In here, mom. I'm just gonna grab the keys and we'll leave."

"Are the boys staying?" She asks when she walks into Brendon's room.

"Ryan is."

"Okay. We're leaving right after you. We should be back on Sunday. Keys are on the counter, don't wreck the car." She says as she swiftly kisses him on the cheek and walks out.

"Where are your parents going?" I finally ask.

"Some convention or whatever." He shrugs and opens the door. "Let's go."

"Okay Brenny." Spencer teases. Brendon rolls his eyes and shoves him out the door.

I walk behind Spencer and Brendon follows behind me. He grabs the keys on the kitchen counter as we walk out of the house and into the small gray car.

The radio was on some old jazz station, which no one was interested in. Until a Frank Sinatra song came on and Brendon began humming to it. From what I could hear his voice was beautiful. It hit every note exactly on key.

The bowling alley smelt of old sweat and cigarettes mixed with a little bit of feet. It looked like there was an elderly home outbreak with all of these old people.

We bought our shoes and found an empty rink, Brendon straggling behind while he paid for it at the front desk. When Spencer and I finished tying our shoes, we walked over to a rack with different colored bowling balls. Spencer walked beside me and whispered to me.

"Now that you know he's gay, you should make a move." He said with a high, suggestive tone in his voice.

"Doesn't mean he likes me." I say in the same overly positive tone to mock him.

"He was staring at your ass when we were walking away." At this my face immediately goes red. He picks up a ball and walks away, leaving me with those words. I don't believe him. I don't have an ass that he could even stare at.

Spencer won the game by a long shot. My arms are just too weak and scrawny. Brendon kept making gutter balls. Spencer rubbed it in our face the whole ride home.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. You're the champion. Now get out of my car." Brendon said when we got back.

Spencer hops out of the car first. "Bye losers. You guys have fun." He said as he walked next door to his house.

"Big shot." I chuckled as we walked into Brendon's empty house.

"I thought he was quiet?"

"He's really friendly, actually. It doesn't really take him long to warm up to people. That's why I'm surprised he's my friend."

"...Have you warmed up to me?" He said shyly. I'd only known him for five days, and within the first day I had already concluded I liked him. That's pretty fast in my opinion.

"Uh, well, yeah. We like a lot of the same things, so it wasn't that hard, I guess." He just nods and we walk up the stairs to his room. We both change into clothes to sleep in and plop on his living room couch downstairs. Brendon reaches for the remote and turns on the TV to a random channel, looks like MTV.

We watch the show for a few minutes until Brendon speaks up.

"Hey, Ry?"

"Yeah?"

"Who used to live here before me?" He sounded like a little kid asking about the boogie man.

"Just some family with a kid who used to push me around. His name was Brent."

"Why would he push you around?" No one really knew why he bullied me, other than Spencer and I.

"He, uh, just didn't like me."

"Why?" Well, shit. I guess he's gonna find out one way or another

"He was a homophobe."

"Oh." He understood immediately.

"So, does that mean..." He starts back up seconds later.

"Yeah...But the thing is, Brent didn't really know if I was or not. Just thought I was. The only people that know for sure are Spencer and, well, you, I guess." I was surprised by my audacity. I guess it just made me mad that Brent had no idea if I was or wasn't. He just thought I looked like a "fag" and started picking on me.

"Oh...Okay. Well, you aren't alone obviously." He said trying to make me feel better, when all it did was make this feel even more awkward.

"I think I brought a movie in my bag. I'm gonna go check in your room." I say quickly, running from the conversation. I walked up the stairs quickly and bolted for Brendon's room.

As I searched the room for my bag, forgetting where I placed it when I changed, I noticed a red notebook on Brendon's desk. I opened the inside of the cover and read:

"BRENDON'S JOURNAL KEEP OUT OR DIE"

Well then. The warning didn't help at all, if anything it made me more intrigued. I open to the last entry written yesterday.

'I've been getting used to hanging out with Spencer and Ryan. The more I talk to Ryan, the more I realize how cool he is. He seems really quiet, but when he gets comfortable, he has a lot of smart things to say. I'm starting to think he may even like me back'

Oh my God. Back? I may like him back? As in he likes me? Am I on drugs? Is he on drugs? Could he real-

"Hey if you can't find it, we've got Mission Impossible."

"Yeah I must have forgotten it. We can just watch that." I say with a smile and hop downstairs and onto the couch. Brendon puts the CD in and the movie starts, but I can't focus.

Brendon likes me.

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