i took this chance to rest as well, closing my eyes and holding him tight. luckily, it was but another dreamless night—nothing to ruin my thought process, and nothing to fear.
sometimes i wonder what life would be like if i really understood feeling from interaction. i don't know what's normal, and what's not. I had some sense of morality, so i knew at least a few things that i shouldn't do. the easy things, don't kill anyone, don't purposefully harm someone, and don't leave *him behind. i knew those things were wrong, just upon some reasoning engraved in my mind that i presume i've had since i was young. i wonder why i have a well education, i was only seven when we took off. it might be due to prior experience in school, or something i picked up along the way. i knew whatever the hell geometry was, or at least the basics. but living under the radar with a name i wasn't born with, was much tougher than 10th grade math. it was stressful, but when there's a true reason.. a little good in a world filled with dread... someone who doesn't have the heart to hurt anyone due to their mental state. someone i could finally protect.
he's why i keep going.
but in all honesty, even with those morals—id go against them in a heartbeat to help him. to do something for him. to give him the peace he never received. because living like this.. he means more than the world ever will to me.
it's one of those days.
i never dug into his past, or at least i don't remember him telling me about it. but sometimes.. he has a backslide. he'll do great, hell, he'll do better than me. and then everything will fall apart again. this probably isn't the best day for it.. though—especially after the whole shower ordeal. nothing i can do to change that now, though. he woke up looking like shit—and not in some ugly, gross appearance kind of way - but in a way he just looked gone. his skin was paler, his eyes always off in the distance as he thought. he hasn't eaten today, and it worries me—but really, there's nothing i can do about it. it'll hurt him more if i try to help.
DU LIEST GERADE
Forget Me Not (BL)
RomantikThe story of empty love. To receive and yet not understand. Theo is a young man with his world collapsing. Leto is trying his hardest to keep him together, and at arms length. When morality is forgotten for the sake of protection, and jealousy leads...
