Forget Me Not (BL)

(23) Distractions

we ended up going out, he had extra pocket money to go shopping—at least for new clothes. i don't know the last time we've gotten new clothes, actually - at least a year, by now. there's a mall complex just down the street, so we decided to go there rather than walk for longer. the sidewalks were crowded, so many people. so many faces ill never recognize, so many voices ill never know. the roads were swarmed with cars, shiny and matte with dirt. the horns, the shouts, the whirrs of engines all filled the air—along with the mix of the smell of exhaust, and the occasional strong cologne that some guy probably sprayed too much on his shirt before a date. the sounds didn't bother me much, as they were something i had to put up with daily when i walked to work. speaking of work, i'm surprised he was able to find jobs mowing nowadays. i think he tends to the plots of grass between roads to make places seem 'eco-friendly'. i wont ask, though. i mean.. his work is his time, and my work is my own. we don't interfere, and we go along with whatever. on a more relevant note, despite my unbothered existence within the heavy crowd of people that strolled the streets alongside us, he thought otherwise. he kept bumping into me, trying to stay as close to me, and as far away as possible from others. every shout, every engine, and every screech of brakes would cause him to wince or shrink back. he held onto the edge of my shirt like a kid, as if he'd get lost if he didn't. he'd apologize each and every time he ran into me, but it's not like i minded.

walking on these streets almost felt.. surreal. i couldn't feel my head, and everything just seemed a little less.. *real. there were so many people, the constant chatter felt like a murmur in my ears as i fell into my train of thought. the street signs seemed so dull, like they were adept at preventing attention. my feet dragged along the gravely sidewalk, little pebbles grinding beneath my shoes and the concrete. it sounded like a rumble, it was all i could focus on sound-wise. the sky seemed too empty, no clouds, and the sky wasn't even blue. it was this emotionless gray, warning of rain. my legs hurt. these shoes are too small. i felt a sharp prick of pain in my arm, his nails accidentally dug into my skin as he held onto my sleeve. why, though? it only took me a moment to realize, he was stumbling slightly as if he floundered or needed to catch his balance. but i saw someone else doing the same, or more accurately—shifting away and rubbing their shoulder. someone had run into him, or vice versa. or at least, thats what i got out of it. he sighed, the scarf draped over his shoulders and coiled around his neck—to both keep the chill air away, and to hide the bites and marks on his skin—falling slightly loose as he finally got back to walking properly.