Deadland

Chapter 91- Isolation

Rick continues, "It's that much more true- it's ours by right. Any person who would live in peace and fairness, who would find common ground, it's their right too. But those who use and take and kill to carve out the world make it theirs alone- we end them. We don't...celebrate it. We don't have shame about it, either. There's only one person who has to die...and I will kill him myself. I will. I will." 

My heart catches in my throat. I will put myself in front of that bullet to Negan's head if I have to. I don't care if the whole group hates me, I've already achieved that. 

But I can't allow Negan to die. I can't. 

"But if it's the others...the others who prop him up, stand by his side, even those who just look the other way- so be it. Then...we keep making the world bigger. Together." Rick finishes. 

Ezekiel speaks next. "Together." He repeats. "Bound forever! To quote The Bard, 'For he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother'." He pats Rick on the back with a bright smile. 

Then he turns to Maggie, who still has barely even looked at me. "For she today, my sister." He says, putting his hand on her shoulder. 

Shiva, the tiger roars. Alyssa giggles next to her and lays her head on Shiva's stomach. 

"We've practiced." Maggie booms. "We've been through it over and over again. We all know the plan doesn't end this morning. That we may have to live in uncertainty for days, maybe more. That we have to keep our faith in each other. If we can hold onto that with everything we have, the future is ours. The world is ours." Maggie then turns to Rick, who is looking at a field a few miles out.

Rick turns to us, "We end this now!" 

Then, everyone but me cheers, pumping their fists into the air, high-fiving each other, celebrating. 

A few hours later, everyone has their assigned jobs and has taken out all of the lookouts. I'm still unsure if I want to go with Rick and fight. 

I have a fear that if I do, I'll turn the gun on the people next to me, not in front of me. 

Alyssa comes down to my cell as I'm twirling my knife on my finger, weighing my options. 

Once I hear the door creak open, I stand and sheathe my knife. 

"Thirty minutes." She tells me. "You going?" 

I bite my lower lip in deep thought. 

"I didn't know it was gonna be this hard." I sigh, knawing on my bottom lip. 

She sighs and unlocks the cell door, entering and leaning on the bars. "If it's too easy, it's not right. Lori taught us that." 

I nod, avoiding Alyssa's gaze. I pick at my cuticles and feel my blood start to rush faster as I think about what to do too hard. 

Alyssa notices immediately, "You do not have to do it if you don't want to. You don't have anything to prove to any of us. We know you, Adrian. We know your heart. And we know how Nick is. I had a meeting with all of Alexandria about...everything." 

I quickly look at her but she puts her hands out, "I didn't tell them too much! Just that he's a master manipulator, especially when it comes to you. At least we, the people you left Terminus with, know you are not a Savior. You were a prisoner." 

I sigh, my lip quivering uncontrollably. 

If you don't go, someone else might kill Nick.

I quickly look at Alyssa, my eyes roaming over her as I comprehend the possibility of being able to kill Nick once and for all.