𝐍𝐨 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐓𝐨 𝐃𝐢𝐞

𝟐𝟏

["I'll be there for you."]

❦

Apprehension consumed me inside as I waited in front of the massive, wooden door. Just before I decided that maybe this wasn't a good idea and I should leave, Maria appeared giving me a loving kiss.

"You look tense." She noted moving her hand up and down my chest. "Don't be scared, he won't bite you. He stopped doing that five months ago." I let out a short laugh allowing myself to relax a bit.

"I just... I thought he was dead for five years and now I'm getting to know him. What if he doesn't need a father?" The very thought of it filled me with anxiety. I don't even know him, but I loved him from the very start when I found out about his existence.

He grew up without a father, maybe after meeting me he realized that he didn't need one. Maybe even Maria realizes that they don't need me and that they should go on with their lives without me.

Seeing my discomfort, Maria directed my thoughts to her. "Hey. He'll love you the way you love him, just be patient. Time has its ways of weaving stories and when that happens, no one will be able to break that bond. Not even death."

The burden that had been weighing heavily on me slowly began to dissipate. A renewed sense of optimism replaced the feelings of rejection that I had been imagining. It wasn't just her words that helped, but also the warmth in her eyes and the sincerity in her voice that cut through the layers of my apprehension and provided a soothing comfort.

"Do you want me to call him?" Her seraphic voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I nodded, watching her slowly turn around and open the large wooden door that stood between us like a barrier. "Ivan, lyubimyy, vykhodi. Kto-to prishel k vam v gosti."

When she said the last word there was a small tapping on the floor followed by a petite, blue figure.

Those blue eyes are so familiar that I remember looking at them in the mirror. Messy blond hair, imprecisely cut, bounced and swayed with every movement of this little one.

Maybe I'm hallucinating–dreaming again.

I look at him and see myself.

I saw Maria as she put her hand on the boy's shoulder, dropping to her knees until she was a tender height. "Ivan, eto tvoy otets."

Large eyes pierced me curiously. And I just stood there, not knowing what to say or do.

"Papa." Laughter rang in my ears as little hands wrapped around my leg, sticking together like thistle.

As I held him in my arms, a rush of emotions flooded over me. The warmth of his little body against mine created a feeling that was hard to put into words – a blend of tenderness, vulnerability, and a strong sense of wholeness.

In that moment of embrace, all the weight of years faded away, leaving only the purity of the present. Our heartbeats synchronized, echoing the beginning of our journey together.

I mustered the strength to speak, unable to let him go. "Ivan, syn moy. YA tak rada nakonets vstretit'sya s toboy."

❦