What The Heart Wants (Sebastian Vettel)

18. Jealousy

Seb took a swig of his beer, his eyes glued to Jessie as she stood talking to a group of Team Penske mechanics.  

It hadn't been the best of days for Team Penske, with their drivers finishing thirteenth, fifteenth and twenty ninth, but they seemed to be celebrating as hard as the Chip Ganassi  team, who were across on the other side of the club celebrating Marcus Ericsson's win. 

Seb didn't really want to be there. If it had been up to him he and Jessie would have had a quiet night in, watching movies and eating pizza, but Jessie had insisted on going out.  He guessed that was understandable, these were her friends.  She hadn't seen them for years, of course she wanted to hang out with them.

Still, at least he got to secretly eye fuck her.  She looked amazing in her little black dress. Short, low cut, it had his desire for her growing more intense. 

"She's a little cracker isn't she?"  He turned his head and saw Josef grinning back at him.   "Oh, don't worry, I'm not after her, I love my wife. But if you don't make a move soon, someone else will."

"What makes you think I want to make a move on her?" he replied.  Was he that obvious?

"Oh I don't know," Josef replied in a sarcastic tone.  "Maybe because you haven't taken your eyes off of her all night.  Maybe it's because you look like your eyes are going to pop out of your head. Maybe it's because you've looked like a bulldog chewing on a wasp every time a man talks to her. Don't worry, I don't think she's noticed.  She's too busy having fun.  It's good to see.  Even before the split with Joel she wasn't happy.  She was under a lot of pressure, but I guess you know about that, being her bestie."   Seb nodded.  He knew that Josef was probably referring to Jessie's struggle to conceive. 

"She's a great girl.  She deserves someone who will treat her like a Queen."

"That's not me. I mean, I would, but she doesn't see me like that."

"You're sure of that?"

"I've known Jessie for thirteen years.  Not once has she ever given me a sign that she sees me as more than a friend.   Plus it's complicated.  I'm about to go through a divorce.  My ex is already telling people I left her for Jessie.  I don't think it's fair that Jessie will be blamed for my divorce."

"That's your call, I'm just saying that sooner or later she will move on.  You don't want to live a life full of regrets.  If you want her, tell her.  Now I have alcohol to drink.  See you about!"

Seb found himself alone again, Josef's words stuck in his head.   The American was right that one day Jessie would move on.   He just didn't know if he could risk their friendship.  He'd rather have her in his life as his friend than not have her in his life at all.

"Well hello gorgeous," he heard a woman shout loudly near his ear.  Hr turned, recognising the bubbly blonde he'd met at the Speedway on Thursday. Lara? Lana? She was wearing a silver sequinned mini dress that seemed to be a size too small for her. Her breasts were almost popping out the top of it.

"Hey," he replied.

"I was hoping I'd see you here. Having fun?" she asked, batting her obviously fake eyelashes.

Seb nodded, he couldn't very well say he was agonising over his attraction to Jessie and would rather be anywhere else but there.

"Did you want to dance?"

Seb wasn't stupid. He knew she was flirting. He wasn't at all interested. If he couldn't have Jessie, he didn't want anybody. He'd settled before with Ava,  and look how that had turned out. He didn't want to hurt Lana's feelings though, she seemed nice enough.