Dagger Series #7: Unbalanced

Chapter 15: Freedom

I like to feel like I'm making an effort for the day. Most people in their own profession would wake up, put their makeup on, and choose the best outfit to wear to work. Like an armor to prepare for the battle.

Inabot ko ang cellphone ko. I played the first thing on the list, and I started my warm-up. Fifteen minutes later, I was primed to go.

I reached for my phone again, and I searched for Tchaikovsky from my playlist and the particular variation that I wanted. "Swan Lake, Op. 20, TH 12, Act 3, Number 19 F, Pas de six, Variation 5," I mumbled. What a mouthful.

It's for Odile's variation. It's one of my favorites. "And yet I haven't used it in a performance."

My manager prefers that I perform softer and more dramatic pieces. Most of those are from lead characters who are considered the protagonists. She and my mother agreed that I look better playing those kinds of parts since I have a soft look.

Hindi ako nakikipagtalo sa kanila sa bagay na iyon lalo na kay Naomi. Despite everything, she knows how to do her job. I have sponsors lined up as proof of that.

But Olena and I would often practice variations that were far from what people usually see me perform. One of those is Odile's variation, which is from Swan Lake. Sometimes it's called the Black Swan.

It's a complicated piece that requires a ballerina to dance en pointe, it's very technical and precise, and it requires stamina. But what I like the most about it is its angst.

Naglakad ako papunta sa gitna ng glass house. While looking in the mirror, I arranged the expression on my face as I began the first step. It wasn't a wicked expression to emphasize Odile's role, and it isn't the blank stoic that some ballerinas do when performing this variation. Instead, there's a small curved on my lips, a tug in the corners, that makes me look almost smug and haughty.

There were a lot of hand movements in this variation, as if to replicate wings. There's also a handful of extensions, leaps, temps levé in arabesque, which is basically just a number of hops with one leg stretched behind, and fouettes and pirouettes, which are a series of turns.

Some ballerinas often portray Odile either with a hint of anger or a misplaced joy because of too much smiling. I don't find Odile angry. She was deceptive and manipulative, but one of the most important traits she has is that she's a seductress.

I matched the music as it went louder and faster, taking in all the wide space of the room. I was nearly flying with each leap, but I made sure that I landed with grace while at the same time ensuring that my body kept its lines beautifully.

The music reaches its final notes, and the narrative finally closes. My final pose became the punctuation of the story's conclusion. I assumed the position with one foot bent in front while the other stretched behind me and one arm pointing downward while the other was stretched upward.

"Wow."

I almost slip into a split in surprise if I don't manage to pull myself up in the last second. Nilingon ko ang pintuan ng glass house at bahagyang namilog ang mga mata ko nang makita ko roon si Domino na nakatayo habang may dalang tray ng pagkain.

"Oh my god, Domino. Are you trying to kill me?"

"Nope. I'm trying to feed you." Itinaas niya ang hawak niya. "Breakfast?"

Breakfast. The word sounded like a ping in my mind that reminded me of my morning's mantra. Dance, kiss Domino, eat breakfast.

Oh shit. "Pwede naman kitang puntahan sa kusina."

Nagkibit-balikat siya. "Now I saved you a trip so you can continue dancing after you have breakfast and a few minutes of rest."