Sober to death

Chapter 1

The Mapo bridge.

The suicide bridge.
This was his chance.
He could just do it now.

He was already over the railing.
Now, it didn't matter.

Nothing did.

It was just him and the water.

All he could do was let go.

.

"Hyunjin what is it? You've called me a thousand times, there is a reason I am not answering. I'm packed up with work, you could just enter my room if you need something."

"Perhaps you are Mr Bang?"

"Who is this?"

"We are from the police department and we are calling from, if I am not mistaken, Mr Hwang's phone. Could you please come over?"

"Um... yeah, sure. Is Hyunjin okay? Did something happen?"

"Please, come here and then we'll discuss further about this issue."

"Is he hurt? Is he alive?"

"Mr Bang, please come over."

.

"Chan? Where are you going it's 2 a.m."

"Changbin, uh- police called me from Hyunjin's phone, they want me to go there right now, I am his first safety contact."

"Hey, calm down. What happened?"

"That's the problem! They-"

"Chan?"

"Minho...I'm going to the police. It has to do with Hyunjin. They want me to go as soon as possible but they won't tell me if he's okay, or if he's hurt not even if he's alive or dead i-"

"Come on, I'm driving both of you get in the car."

.

"Hello, I'm Bang Chan, we are together."

"Okay. Follow me."

"What happened? Is he... dead?"

"Look, Mr Bang, there was reported that a person was in danger and he was located on the Mapo Bridge. That person was Mr Hwang. "

"N-no. Is he-"

"He went there as fast as we could and we found him over the railings of the bridge. He let go but fortunately he was caught by two police officers."

"So, he's okay?"

"Yes, worryingly so. We thought of putting him on a suicide watch for a few days but being aware of your social status we concluded it would be best calling you first."

"Thank you officer. Can we see him?"

"Sure."

.

"I've told you already! Chan, Changbin, Minho. Thank God you're here-"

"I'm sorry could we be left alone?"

"Of course, this is the department of psychology here in the police station, it is a safe space for everyone, if you meed anything please call for me. "

"Thank you."

"Hyunjin... what happened?"

"I've been telling everyone they are overdramatic. Nothing happened, I don't even know how they found me."

"They told us you almost..."

"Chan, I slipped. I've told everyone already. I just slipped."

"Jinnie... I think you mean you slipped from the role you've forced yourself to keep playing. "

"Minho what?"

"Changbin just... let me do this. Jin... please show me your arms."

"No, why-"

"You said you fell and there were bruises. I want to see the bruises."

"N-no."

"Hyunjin, I won't ask nicely again."

"F-fine."

And Hyunjin slowly pulled up the long sleeved shirt he has been wearing.
A shirt colored in a bright blue color, making him look like an innocent teenager.
Only he wasn't one.
He looked naive and innocent like a kid but he was far from being that.
In fact the angry, deep, self destructive red cuts and scars scattered all over his arms, all the way up to his elbow, revealed the ugly, raw truth; even if Hyunjin had a hidden inner child, buried in fear within himself, that child was far too wounded, far too hurt and used and hated and buried too deep, in too much fear, self hatred, pain and sadness.

He may have been portraiting a carefree, happy, enthusiastic teen but his soul had rotted into a suicidal, numb personal hell.

•••••••••••••••••••••
Hello, I hope you have a great day/night!
Please, before you continue reading think of yourself and your mental state. I am aware you will most probably continue reading but... keep in mind that it is not real and you matter more than a product of a random person's imagination.

Take care.

Ivy.