Shattered Hearts

Chapter Twenty-Six

I REFUSED TO SULK IN DESPAIR, thinking of a man who distanced himself from me. I mean, what did I expect from this ruthless creature, who shouldn't give a fuck about no one but his position as Pakhan. That was the rule: love no woman, for it is considered foolishness-a boneheaded person thought of this rule. You could have a woman and be the most potent leader because you have something to lose, right? It's fear causing these foolish men to think unreasonably.

Despite the alarm bells keeping me awake at night, my body still craved Adrik's rough touch. It brought me into this risky situation; that pull of attraction, desire and the need for a man's attention. I doubted it was this once because the thought of leaving and never seeing this man again made me shiver and caused my heart to shatter more than it already had because of the people I called family.

I needed answers, but not the terrible truths it came with. Convincing Adrik was the most formidable task yet to come. He wouldn't allow me internet access because of how "risky" it was. I trusted him, but how could I tell him I was the wrong person and that my mother was a whore and my name was Julia Rodriguez. It's madness. I didn't know anything, so why would I share false information?

I sighed, picking up one of Jessica Clare's hitman books for the fourth time. Last Kiss is intriguing. It makes me want to read more about the heroine's straightforwardness and the hero's ruthlessness, but overthinking took all my energy, especially when I had no one to share those thoughts with. It would almost be like Adrik and me if there were a happy ever after. What Adrik and I shared is bound to shatter hearts and destroy. Yet, I was selfish to want more.

I closed the book, not wanting to read the same line more than the many times I did. I pulled the fallen strap of the floral slip dress over my shoulder and got up to go to the kitchen. I got occupied with my thoughts that I hadn't eaten anything but a smoothie and one pancetta egg muffin this morning.

I opened the fridge and sighed for the hundredth time today. I had no appetite but needed to eat before I got stomach pains. These were the worst kinds, especially when Edoardo left the house for business. Ginevra wouldn't make me something to eat, and I couldn't turn the stove on. That is why I can cook. I spent my days watching cook shows and educational videos because it was all I could access.

I grabbed the vegetables and chicken before running the latter under the water to get it thawed and then entered the pantry and took out the ingredients to make flatbread.

I checked the time and would finish in one hour or more. I chopped my vegetables whilst the dough rested and cooked it before focusing on the chicken. I didn't like any of the sauces in the pantry, so I made my own.

I hummed and swayed my hips to the music because it made me work faster. The chicken smelled delicious even after I wiped away my mess and placed the dirty wares in the dishwasher.

I now had to sit down and enjoy this chicken wrap by myself. I didn't let it bother me. The extras will go inside the fridge until tomorrow. I began to sit after I poured a glass of green soda for myself with my novel when the elevators chimed.