impurities | summerz

Chapter 5

Chaewon's POV

Kazuha opened the door just enough for me to see her worried eyes, as if she was testing the waters, and I quickly wiped my tears as much as I could before I nodded for her to come inside. She sat on the edge of my bed, unaware of how to console me.

"You okay?" She put her hand on my thigh and I couldn't hold in my tears. She didn't ask me what was wrong, simply just opened her arms and wrapped me tightly in their warmth.

How could I tell her that I went to Haechan's house a few hours ago, that I asked him what was wrong, and that he said he'd been seeing other women this entire time. That he said he wasn't attracted to me anymore all while failing to make eye contact. He made it seem like there was something wrong with me, that I couldn't pleasure him, that I wasn't enough for him. It took everything in me to not burst into tears in front of him, but I didn't want him to see me like that, so I held it in until I got to my room, and I've been crying for hours. How could I tell her that?

I just cried into her shoulder as she rubbed my back comfortingly, my tears soaking her shirt. It was oddly consoling, Kazuha's scent, being wrapped in her strong arms, listening to the sound of her breathing.

I'd calmed down enough to pull away and look at her, my vision still blurred with more tears threatening to fall. She took a hand to my cheek, wiping the stray tears.

"What's wrong?" Her voice was wary, worried if she'd crossed the line.

"Haechan broke up with me." The words tasted bitter as I said them. I thought that Haechan was amazing, possibly the one to introduce to my family, even the one to move in with.

Kazuha's eyebrows furrowed at my words, confused.
"Did he say why?"

"He's been seeing other women." I almost choked on my words, "he said he's not attracted to me anymore."

The brunette's eyebrows furrowed again, but not with confusion, with anger. I could tell she was angry but was holding back to continue consoling me. She hugged me again, this time shorter and planted a kiss on my forehead.

"I'm so sorry, you didn't deserve that. And honestly, it's his loss, you're beautiful." Kazuha took my hands into hers, the warmth was comforting, her thumb rubbed over my palm slowly.

"I honestly expected it, but that doesn't mean I was prepared." She nodded in understanding, "I just need to get my mind off it." I sighed, sniffling as she looked up to the ceiling, deep in thought.

"Mmm...How about I get the ice cream from the freezer, and we can binge one of those dramas you love?" She smiled one of her bright smiles that showed her teeth and squeezed my hand lightly.

"No girl tonight?" I smiled, for the first time in what seems like forever.

"Ah I forgot her name, she got pissed and left." She grinned at me again and it felt like everything would be okay.

"I could go for some ice cream."

//

My eyes were heavy and tired from crying so much but I couldn't miss one of the only times Kazuha watched a drama. She always left whenever me and the girls would watch with an excuse of a workout. She walked from the kitchen, ice cream in hand and settled beside me under the blanket.