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Hurt.

I was scrolling through my Instagram feed when I saw a post from one of the fan pages that I followed, it was a photo of Ale... nothing out of the ordinary, they posted photos of her all the time, but the caption definitely was.

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Barcafemfans11 Jenni and Alexia content! Jenni posted this to her story last night before deleting it soon after. It looks like Alexia is in Paris for the Christmas break, is she there to visit Jenni?

alexia11fan I'm so confused, are Ale and Isy still together or not?
> username826 They left the training ground together yesterday, so I think they are.
barcagirly Ale looks so happy
putella5_reina I miss them together

She was with Jenni...

Why didn't she tell me? Had she been planning to see her all this time? Did she even have a photoshoot in Paris or was it just an excuse to visit her ex?

I had so many questions, my brain was in overdrive and although my heart was hurting, deep down I knew there must be a simple explanation for  why they were together, but in at the moment I couldn't see it.

I was busy stalking Jenni's socials, looking for any kind of clue when my phone vibrated in my hand, a text notification appearing at the top of my screen.

Ale 🥰

Morning Cariño, how did you sleep? I miss you so much xx

I couldn't answer her. I didn't want to start an argument with her while she was in a different country and I definitely couldn't pretend like everything was ok. She had been with Jenni, everything wasn't ok. She had been with her ex and didn't think to tell me... her girlfriend.

I spent the rest of the day trying to keep busy, taking Nala for a walk at the beach and going out for a coffee with Mapi and Ingrid before returning home and making myself some dinner.

I finished eating and tidied the kitchen before joining Nala who was fast asleep on the sofa. I checked my phone for the first time since this morning and had multiple messages from Ale. I hadn't responded to her at all during the day and she was clearly worrying that something was going on.

Ale 🥰

Morning Cariño, how did you sleep? I miss you so much xx

Everything ok? Xx

Hope that you're having a good day xx

We've finished early so I'm going to come back tonight instead of tomorrow morning, it'll be late by the time I land so I'll get a taxi home xx

I don't know if you've seen my messages, but it's not like you not to reply. Are you ok? xx

I'm getting on the plane now, so I'll see you in a couple of hours xx

I love you xx

I was in bed by the time Ale arrived home, partly because I was tired and partly in an attempt to avoid having to talk to her. I couldn't have this conversation tonight.

I heard the front door open, the sound of her suitcase on the hardwood floor was quickly followed by the clicking of the door closing behind her. I turned over onto my right hand side so that my back was facing the bedroom door and pretended to be asleep. My eyes closed tightly as I waited for Ale to make her way upstairs.

The sound of her footsteps got closer, quietly making her way up the stairs before heading down the hall towards our bedroom where she opened the door and stepped inside.

"Are you awake cariño?" she whispered.

I didn't answer.

She stood there for a few moments before heading into the ensuite to have a shower and get ready for bed. I desperately wanted to fall asleep, but no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't. I just laid in bed listening to the sound of the running water and Ale rummaging about in the bathroom.

My body was begging for Ale. I wanted see her, talk to her and lie in her arms as I fell asleep, but my brain was telling me something else. My brain was telling me that she had betrayed me... she had hurt me.

She eventually climbed into bed next to me, shuffling across the mattress and laying her arm across my waist. The moment that her skin touched mine I moved slightly, flinching at the contact, which made it clear to her that I was in fact awake. She sat up slightly, resting on her elbows as she looked down at me.

"What's going on Isy?"
"You've ignored me all day, you pretended to be asleep and now you won't let me touch you, have I done something wrong?

Surely she can't be that ignorant?

"You tell me Ale" I mumbled bluntly, pulling the blanket back from my body and climbing out of bed.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to sleep in the spare room" I said as I made my way towards the door.

"Isy... please just talk to me" She begged.

I stopped for a moment and looked back at her.
"We'll talk in the morning ok? I can't do this right now..."

I sobbed silently as I made my way to the spare room, opening the door and climbing into empty bed, pulling the sheets up to my chin and burying my face in the pillow. After lying there for a few moments I heard the door squeak as it was pushed open, I didn't look up expecting to hear Ale's voice any minute trying to get me to come back to bed, but it never came. Instead I felt the mattress dip slightly beside me. Nala jumped up on to the bed and made her way towards me, nuzzling her face in the side of mine, placing a gentle licks on my ear.

I thought I had closed the door, how did she get in here? 

I lifted my head from the pillow and wrapped my arms around the small pup holding her close to me as I tried and failed to fall asleep.