Little Mafia Princess

13. Do I Want This

*edited*
Ella's Pov:

The walk back up to the house feels so much longer than the run down was. I can't bring myself to fight anymore so I just lay over Grayson's shoulder like a dead fish crying my eyes out half due to the pain in my ankle and the other due to the realization there is no getting away from this. I'm pulled out of my thoughts as Grayson places me on the ground causing me to hiss in pain and instantly take all the weight off my ankle, before looking up to see a very unimpressed Xavier.

" Well this was fun I think we're just going to go now say bye to Xavier Bella"

Grayson says quickly. I don't blame him for wanting to get out of here you could cut the tension in this room with a knife.

" Bye Xavier"

She says waving as they both walk out the door, but Xavier never once takes his eyes off me, causing me to instantly look down trying to escape his burning gaze.

" Look at me"

He says dominantly causing me to whimper but I do what I'm told not wanting to anger him any further still not fully knowing what he's capable of.

" I-"

I start but he instantly holds his hand up shaking his head no causing me to stop speaking.

" Do you really hate me that much"

He sighs running his fingers through his dark brown hair, it shocked me to see a look of hurt in his eyes, did he actually care about me this whole thing is just messing with my head I feel like I can't think straight around him.

" No"

I sigh. I mean yes the man did kidnap me but he's shown me more kindness than any other man in my life other than Ollie of course, and when I involuntarily fell into my little space to escape this whole mess inside my head and the mess that is my life at the moment, he actually took care of me, and wasn't disgusted or annoyed with me.

" Are you even a little or was this just all an act so you could wait for the perfect opportunity to leave"

He says angrily looking into my eyes causing me to shrink under his gaze. I say nothing not trusting my voice shaking my head no.

" Then why"

He sighs in frustration.

" I have a life, friends, independence, and freedom you can't just take that away from someone and expect everything to be okay"

I shout angering through my tears, trying my best to not put weight on my ankle that is still killing me. He looks down noticing that I keep shifting my weight, before eventually giving up and then just trying to balance on my good foot but I lose balance causing me to put weight on my bad ankle,  causing me to let out a small whine in pain trying my best to hide it but Xavier just walks over to me and picks me up bridal style before walking me over to the couch sitting me down and getting two of the gray cushions placing one behind my back and one under my ankle. I feel even worse now, I mean he hasn't done anything but look after me even now hurt and angry he's still looking after me.

" They didn't seem like very good friends to me"

He scoffs before standing up off the couch and walking into the kitchen, he comes back seconds later with a bag of frozen peas. Xavier walks over gently placing the frozen peas on my ankle causing me to hiss in pain before he sits down across from me on the couch.

" They took me in when no one else would and cared for me and loved me for who I am"

I say defensively.

" I know Ella "

He says causing me to look at him curiously, what is he talking about?

" What"

I start to say but he cuts me off.

" I did my research your full name is Ella May Anderson you got charged for trespassing and petty theft quite a few times as a teen but still managed to graduate high school, and at the age of twenty you were assaulted you refused to tell anyone to but then Skyler came with you and eventually you told police what had happened. You work at a little cafe you live with your best friend Skyler, your favorite colors are pink and yellow your favorite shows are rugrats but the old one, not the new one, as well as SpongeBob your favorite Disney movies are Winnie The Pooh and Beauty And The Beast and you don't really like being alone, or going to new or crowded places as it gives you anxiety"

He says shocking me even more and making this whole thing even more confusing than it already is.

" How long have you been watching me?"

I question looking over at him in shock.

" Only a week"

He shrugs taking me back even more, he picked up on all those things in just a week I mean obviously doesn't take a genius to work out that he got my background checked and, had my personal file for the first part but everything else he just observed not even Skyler and Ollie knew what my favorite movies are.

" Listen, Ella"

Xavier says seriously pulling me out of my thoughts.

" If you want to leave that badly I will let you go I don't want you to hurt yourself trying to get away from me, because you may not believe me when I say this but I care about you, Ella. But I also ask that you give me the chance to be your daddy even if it's just a trial run for two weeks, let me prove to you I don't want to hurt you and I want to protect you care for you, and spoil you, I will let you think about it tonight and give your space if you want to leave in the morning you can I will tell one of the maids to take care of anything you need tonight "

He says before getting up and walking out of the room. How could someone I just met care about me so much I feel like my mind is going through a dryer with all the thoughts circling my head? I mean I do love my friends but on the other end, everything that's happened since I've been here, my own little bedroom and playroom, having someone take care of me and not be grossed out by me being a little, and having playdates with other littles is everything I've ever wanted. But did I really want it this way can't I just have my cake and eat it too? Being here wouldn't be so bad would it I mean Xavier did say we can do a trial run and then if I'm unhappy after the trial period I still have the choice to leave, but I also don't want to just leave Skyler and Ollie behind after all they've done for me, maybe if I chose to stay I can convince him to let me see them but then again after today I probably broke all of his trust in me. I groan in frustration throwing myself back on the couch onto some cushions that are behind me and close my eyes trying to get some form of sleep, which feels impossible with a tennis match of back-and-forth thoughts running through my brain.