The night everything changed

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I came back home from training and changed my outfit to go to my boyfriend's house.

I told Xavi where I was going. He didn't even mind that Ferran is my boyfriend since the beginning of our relationship. I don't know if my parents would have loved Ferran if they have met him but I know for a fact that they would have loved Gavi and Pedri. My two best friends.

Ferran and I have never spent a complete night together during our relationship but today, it was his idea. I made a bag full of my necessities for the night and put it in my car. I then drove to his house. When he opened the door, he looked so happy to see me. He had the sweetest smile ever. I have such a deep connection with Ferran, it's crazy. I never told him about my family and I know I should because I trust him. Maybe tonight. Maybe tonight I will tell him. I took a deep breath and entered Ferran's house. Usually, Ferran's house is always clean but today something looked off. His house was a little bit messy.

"Ferran. Why is your house messy today?" I asked while laughing.

"Does it bother you?" He asked me seriously.

"No" I said while laughing awkwardly.

Why is he like that today? We both sat down next to each other on the couch. I looked into his eyes. I knew he wasn't okay.

"Ferran? Is everything okay?" I asked.

"Yeah. Sure."

Before I even said anything, he grabbed my face and kissed me. It wasn't a normal kiss. I felt his anger. What was going on? He was holding my face so tightly in his hands that it hurt me. Ferran never does this. Never.

"Ferran. You are hurting me" I said while trying to push him away.

"Am I hurting you, Sarah?" he asked me while being so angry.

"Yes. Please Ferran stop."

He pushed me away so hard that my head hit the hard edge of the couch. Ouch. Did Ferran purposely do that to me? I felt some memories of my father come back. Ferran then went on top of me and looked into my eyes. He was so so mad. I have never seen him like that. The anger came out of his eyes.

"I am hurting you, Sarah? Really? Huh? What about what you did to me?" he asked while yelling.

I looked into his eyes, wondering what did I do wrong. He started... hitting me. All over my body, especially my face. I couldn't do anything because he was on top of me. I tried to yell but his right hand was on my mouth. He continued hitting me. I felt all the pressure on my face. The memories of my father came all back. The trauma came back. I was able to yell:

"What did I do?"

I was crying like crazy from the pain. Then he responded:

"Yeah. Continue crying. Why don't you go see your f- Pedri? You do trust him with everything."

That's when I understood it all. Damnit Ferran. You are mad at me because of Pedri. You are hurting me because of him.

He continued abusing me for a few minutes until he couldn't anymore. He grabbed a bottle of alcohol and started drinking it. He had pulled my hair and my  clothes were messed up. I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. I could only see my younger self being hit by her father. Ferran was a monster. I didn't have the strength to move but I had to get out of there. Ferran wasn't even caring about  me anymore. He was drinking his alcohol peacefully and didn't realize how he messed me up for life.

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