Peter Parker One Shots

{Surprise Adoption (Pt. 2 of Idiots In Love)}

Numerous requests have come to me asking to make Bucky and Sam kidnap Peter as their son so........

Heh, I live to serve my Fuzzies.

Disclaimer: Ring-a ring-a roses
A pocket full of notes
The note says, I don't own Marvel,
We all fall down!

Lol

TW: Kidnapping but not really kidnapping. Fluff. Peter is Sam and Bucky's child now.

**********

"Where are we going, Mr. Barnes?" Peter asked as he skipped behind Bucky.

"Somewhere," Bucky says cryptically, then scowls, "And stop calling me Mr. Barnes like I'm an old man."

"You are an old man," Peter said immediately and dodged when Bucky's hand came up to slap the back of his head.

Peter giggled as he continued to follow Bucky to wherever he was leading him. 

The older man led Peter to his apartment (which no one knew they had), where Sam warmly greeted him, "Hey, Petey. Welcome to our humble abode."

This caused Peter to stop in his tracks, "Woah, is that really Mr. Wilson or is it an imposter? Why is he being so nice?"

Bucky rolled his eyes and slapped Sam's arm, "Be normal," he hissed.

Sam groaned but reached out to roughly rub his knuckles in Peter's hair, "Welcome to our house, Spider-Brat."

"That's more like it," Peter managed to say while flailing around to escape from Sam's grip.

Bucky sighed and collapsed on the couch, questioning all his life choices.

**********

"What do you MEAN you don't know where Peter is?" Tony yelled, standing up to slam his hands on the table. Happy sighed and shook his head, "I have no clue, Boss. He didn't come to the car as usual after school, so I went to the office. According to them, he was taken out early by an unknown man, but Parker seemed to know him."

"Good lord, that kid," Tony groaned and stomped out to Pepper's office, where Natasha was lounging on the couch as if it were her own, eating a bag of chips. Pepper barely glanced up from the documents she was reviewing, her pen tapping steadily on the table.

"Peter's missing," Tony said without fanfare. 

The tapping stopped. Complete silence, then the ominous crunching of numerous chips crushing as Natasha's hand clenched.

"What?"

**********

It was surprisingly easy to get Peter distracted.

"Mr. Barnes, I should really go now, Mr. Stark must be waiting for me."

"Oh alright, but I bought this 3D version of Star Wars that I've been planning to watch with you and Sam-"

"Mr. Stark can wait."

Currently, Peter was curled up between him and Sam, fast asleep. 

"Nat is going to kill us when she finds him here," Bucky murmured as he stared down at the Spider-Child.

"Worth it," Sam grumbled.

"Is it?" Natasha's sugary, soft voice came from behind them.

As they sat there, caught red-handed, Bucky and Sam exchanged glances. The Black Widow should not be angered at any cost, and this was a rule all the Avengers followed religiously.

"I swear, Nat, it's not what it looks like," Sam soothed, mind racing to come up with an excuse while Peter snored softly between them, completely oblivious to the brewing storm.

Natasha's eyes narrowed dangerously as she crossed her arms and raised her eyebrow. "Oh really? Because it looks like you two have kidnapped Stark's precious protégé and are playing house with him."

"Look me in my eyes and say you won't do the same if you got a chance," Bucky huffed, meeting her glare steadily.

This made Natasha pause, "Yeah, I would," she shrugged, "But Stark is worried out of his mind right now. And Pepper is ready to crucify whoever took Peter away."

Bucky's eyes widened at the mention of Pepper's wrath, "Wait, Pepper's mad too?" he muttered, glancing at Sam.

Sam looked ready to give up on life. No one scared him more than Pepper Potts.

Bucky sighed and nodded, "Okay, okay, we need a plan."

"We could pretend it's all a big misunderstanding," Sam suggested, rubbing a hand through Peter's hair.

Peter stirred between them, mumbling in his sleep about web-swinging through a candy store.

Natasha's gaze softened slightly at the sight of the slumbering teenager. "Fine, but you guys better come up with something convincing."

Bucky and Sam nodded vigorously, their minds racing to concoct the perfect excuse for their impromptu sleepover with Peter.

Peter's stirred again, then his eyes fluttered open, blinking blearily at the trio gathered around him. "What's going on?" he mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

Bucky and Sam exchanged glances again. Yes, kidnapping the Spider-Child was definitely worth any and all wrath.

**********

"What?!" Tony yelled in the phone, "Hell no Barnes, I won't give you partial custody of my kid! Return him home, now."

"Come on, Stark," Bucky groaned, "Just give me and Sam partial custody over him. We're asking for partial custody, not even full."

Before Tony could reply, the phone was plucked out of his hand by Pepper.

"Mr. Barnes," Pepper calmly said.

"Peter will be home in five, ma'am," Bucky immediately said and cut the call.

Sam sighed and curled up in his seat, "I just saw my entire life flash before my eyes, Angel," he gasped.

Bucky wouldn't say it out loud, but he definitely agrees.

"Wait... did I get kidnapped?"

"It's called surprise adoption, you brat!"

**********

A/N: Hello my lovely fuzzies. If you guys could please rewrite any of your prompts or requests that I've missed? I have misplaced quite a few of them, I'm so sorry T_T