Chapter Ten: A Wolf's Woes

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"Momma said 'You're a pretty girl. What is in your head is all that matters. Brush your hair, fix your teeth, what you wear is all that matters."- Beyoncé: Pretty Hurts.

My eyes fluttered open, and as I had realized the sun had yet to rise I groaned. My honey-coloured hair, which was in a neat plait when I went to sleep, had half managed to fall out of the plait, and stick up in weird places. Ugh. Mornings.

"Today is going to be different," I whispered to myself, pushing back the deep red duvet, and placing my small feet on the cold, cobblestone flooring of the dormitory. I stood up, with much reluctance due to it being an ungodly hour, and forced myself into the dorm room's communal bathroom. Thank gods I only had to share with Lily, Marlene, and Alice, as McGonagall had witnessed some of what happened and stuck Athena and Lilly with three transfers from Beauxbatons. Mai Fleur, Donna Dansby, and Anthea Delacour, I believe. They were also arranged to have different housing arrangements while they were here, as for where'd they be staying while we were on holiday.

Looking in the mirror I held back a shriek at my own appearance. That would have to change. I took the hair tie out of my hair, as well as a bobby pin that had found its way into my rats nest, and began stripping out of my clothes in order to shower.

I twisted the hot tap three times, which triggered the jasmine oil to mix in with the water, and cleansed myself while trying to think of a coping strategy for when I see them again.

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After drying my hair, and using an ironing tool to give my hair "natural looking beach waves", I put on minimal makeup, except for the cat eyeliner, and lip balm with a light pink hue. I dressed myself in a safe white blouse, black skater skirt, red and gold headband, black kitten heels, and, obviously, my Gryffindor tie and robe. I accessorized minimally, with only pearl earrings and, the blue topaz ring I had gotten for my fourteenth birthday.

"You can do this. You are better than anything they can do to you. You are beautiful, strong, and smart, and you don't need no man- wait what am I even talking about anymore?" I laughed, as I rambled to myself in the mirror. Gods. I can't even take pep talks seriously.

I crept out of the bathroom, and noticing that the sun had barely risen, and my dormmates were still asleep, I grabbed my book bag, and headed for the common room. Thanks to Lily, the book bag looked brand new again. Gods, I wish I was that good at magic.

The common room was practically empty, with one lone habitant, other than me, sitting in front of the burning fire. Upon further inspection, I noticed that I knew that person.

"Remus, why are you out of bed so early?" I inquired, watching as the boy turned his head towards me. He mumbled something along the lines of 'I could ask you the same thing.' And I took that as my invitation to sit on one of the couches near him. I sat in the recliner across from him and spoke.

"What's wrong, Remus?" I asked softly, the noise almost being rivaled by the crackling of the fire.

"Who said anything was wrong?" he replied defensively. I rolled my eyes.

"You're sat alone in front of a fire pit at gods know what time it is, moping. Plus James, Sirius, and the rat aren't here, so you probably wanted 'alone' time." I replied and, Remus sighed.

"Lilly broke up with me. I told her one of my darkest secrets, and she broke up with me because of it. I just don't understand it. I mean, in a moment, your world is amazing. It's like everything is perfect, and then all of a sudden you say something, and it all comes crashing down like glass, shattering into a million pieces and, as that glass cascades to the hard, stone floor, it manages to slice your heart open with its sharp words that cut like knives. I just feel... empty now." He said, in one big breath. I got up out of my seat and rushed over to where he was sat, enveloping him into my arms.

"I'm so sorry." I said, rubbing his back.

"What are you apologizing for? You haven't done anything." He said, wiping the few tears he shed from his face, and breaking our platonic embrace.

"Sometimes, we apologize for things we have no control over, not because we think we're at fault, but because we think it deserves an apology, and it may not be given by whom it should be given by, but we want to fill that gap, in some way." I replied.

"Gods, we sound like we're in a Shakespeare play that Lily leant me." He laughed slightly. I laughed too.

"Yeah. Yeah we do."

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