I'm Blind Not Fragile

Chapter 24

I wonder how Brandon would describe his girlfriend. Is his Raine quiet? Does she laugh at a joke only to get a look on her face afterward showing that she is missing someone wholeheartedly? Does his Raine spread her compassion to everyone she meets? Does his Raine like dancing in the rain? Does he think he knows her like I thought I knew her?

Feeling the need to do something other than sit in my living room stuck in my thoughts I finally focus on my phone. I had been sitting on my couch looking at my phone without actually seeing the screen. Almost as if she knew Erica texted me at the same moment. My girlfriend seems to have this 6th sense of when I need her. We've been dating for 3 years, and one day I'm going to marry this girl. People say we are too young to know what love is, but what is their proof? I know Erica and I will last much longer than my parents were going to. Mom and dad fought nearly every day before she died. She wanted to leave him, but he wouldn't let her. Howard Lewis doesn't give up things he thinks are his. He has never loved before I don't think. Not like I have. I love Erica and she loves me. And I can see us together in 15 years, with a house outside this godforsaken city, a white picket fence, and a couple of kids who have never had to worry about if mom and dad hate each other. I have loved Erica since she heard something I said out of context in our history class and called me a misogynistic asshole. Little did she know the teacher had asked me how husbands felt about their wives in the 50s. seriously girl if you're going to call someone misogynistic at least know the context of what he said.

I quickly texted her back and told her I would love it if she came over. She responded that she wanted to talk about things. Great now I'm trading one thing to worry about for something else. A couple of days before Raine went missing, Erica found out that she was pregnant. So now we need to talk. Because in my mind I saw us in that big house with that fence and those kids, but suddenly we were just a little younger in the picture. Erica is going to be a wonderful mother. And I know that I will be a good dad. I never really had a good example, but I had Raine. And I think every older sibling on the planet spent a good deal of their own childhoods helping raise their younger siblings.

Not 20 minutes late Erica is walking into the brownstone as if she lives here herself. And the vision makes a thousand butterflies flutter within me. I love this girl, and with the way she looks at me, I know she loves me too.

"Hey, Eric. How are you doing? Have you figured out what is going on between your dad and sister yet?" She asks as she takes her shoes off and walks over to snuggle into my side on the couch. She is gorgeous. Sure some other people would only see the big clunky glasses she always wears instead of her contacts, or the fact that her hair never stays down even after she spent an hour trying to tame the curls. But she's beautiful. She's funny and she's smart and she always makes fun of me for how little I read, then tells me to read her newest book obsession from that week. And let's be honest I didn't catch the perfect girl. She stormed up to me grabbed me by the waist, and flipped me over her shoulder and I have no plans of getting down. Not now not ever.

"No, just more questions. I know she's been living with him for the past couple of days. I don't know why. We didn't get into a fight or anything she just didn't come home one day." I confide in her. I don't want to worry her, but I know she's tough enough to take it, plus it feels so good sometimes to share your problems with someone who knows you inside and out.

"But your dad called and told you she's with him right?" I nodded and she exhales, "Well at least you know she's not in danger. She may not be having a good time considering her relationship with your father. But you can breathe she is not dead or dying, or anything else I know you've imagined happening to her. C'mon Eric, take a breath. Everything's going to be fine, just breath." I follow her instructions and focus on my breath. I know I'm probably overreacting about Raine. And focusing on my breath is a good pause I need to look at all the facts and the bigger picture rather than tunnel visioning on one concerning thing I found out about.