Derek sighs. "I don't know Mom. She's really sick. I don't know if she'd be up for it."
"Derek, I want to see her. I know she's sick. She needs some motherly love, I know she's never had that in her life." Carolyn says to her son.
"I know, she's just not feeling very well mom. She's so tired and so sick."
"I know that. And I won't overwhelm or make her more tired. I just want to be with her and comfort her." Carolyn says softly. "I just need to see her with my own eyes that she's still here with us. I'm terrified of losing her. I've only met her a few times but I love her like she's my own daughter.
"Okay. You can come mom. She'll love having you here." Derek says.
Meredith starts to whimper as she slowly starts to wake up.
"Hey, I've gotta go Mom, Mer's waking up." Derek says quickly.
"Tell her I love her and that I'll be there tomorrow. I'm purchasing my ticket for a flight first thing in the morning."
They hang up.
"D-Der..." Meredith whimpers. "B-bucket..."
Derek sees how pale Meredith looks. He quickly grabs a bucket and she starts throwing up. "You're okay. Let it out. It's okay." He rubs her back gently.
After a bit Meredith stops throwing up and Derek helps her lay back down. "Wanna go home." She mutters.
"It's too dangerous for you to be at home Mer. You're too sick. It's so easy for you to pick up infections right now. You need to stay here where it's safer for you. And you have chemo most days anyway, so it's easier so the doctors can monitor how you're doing."
"Am doctor too." Meredith mutters, closing her eyes.
"I know you are but you can't monitor yourself in this condition." Derek decides to change the subject. "Hey, guess who's coming to visit tomorrow?"
"Who?" Meredith whispers with her eyes closed, completely exhausted from all of the throwing up that she did.
"Mom."
"She's coming?" Meredith smiles.
"She is. She's really worried about you."
Meredith frowns. "Tell her I'm fine."
"You're not fine Meredith and you know it." Derek says softly.
"I'm fine." Meredith mutters and gives into the sleep her body desperately wants. She's sound asleep again.
Derek sits in the chair next to her bed and just watches her chest rising and falling. He is so scared that one day it won't do that anymore. He can't lose her. "You're going to be okay Mer. Just keep fighting." He whispers and strokes her head as she sleeps.
An hour later Dr Bailey comes in to check her vitals. "How's she doing Shepherd?"
Derek sighs. "She's so tired. And she threw up a lot which exhausted her body even more than it already is. Tell me she's in remission Bailey. She can't handle much more. Her body is just so tired and worn out."
Bailey sighs. "I know Derek, I know. And you know she's not yet in remission. This morning's bloodwork showed that it's still there. She's a fighter Derek, she will beat this. If anyone can beat this, it's Grey."
"I hope." He whispers.
"Just stay positive. Don't let her see how scared you are."
"I'm not. I hide it from her. I don't want her to see that. She's dealing with too much already."
Meredith starts squirming around in her bed.
"Mer, you're okay. You're okay." Derek says, holding her hand.
"Mmmmm" Meredith whimpers.
"Shhh, you're okay." Derek says. He looks at Bailey, frowning.
Meredith's whimpers increase in volume. "Mmmmmmmm."
"Derek, her vitals aren't great right now. They're lower than they normally are."
"Make them better Bailey, please!"
"I'm going to give her some medication. Be right back." Bailey hurries out of the room and returns minutes later with medication which she quickly injects into Meredith's central line. "That should help her for now. We really need to get her into remission."
Meredith finally wakes up a few minutes later and slowly opens her eyes but can barely keep them open."I don't feel good."
"Do you need the bucket?" Derek asks.
Meredith shakes her head no. "Don't feel well. Want Cristina." Her eyes close but she forces them back open.
"What doesn't feel well Grey?" Dr Bailey asks her.
"Head...stomach...everything. Just feel sick." Meredith mutters, closing her eyes and opening them back up.
"Mer, don't force yourself to stay awake. You're exhausted. You need your rest." Derek says.
"Don't want to sleep anymore." Meredith whines. "I want to go home."
"You cannot go home Mer. You're too sick." Dr Bailey tells her sternly.
Meredith starts crying a little. "I want to be healthy again. I don't like being sick!"
"We don't like you being sick either." Derek says.
Cristina comes in, after being paged by Derek. "Hey Mer, how are you doing?"
"Don't feel well Cris." Meredith whispers. "Wanna go home."
Cristina sighs. "Mer, you know you can't go home. It's too dangerous right now. You're too sick."
Meredith bursts into sobs at that. All she wants to do is go home and sleep in her bed but everyone keeps telling her no, that she's too sick. "I wanna go home!" She sobs loudly.
Derek and Dr Bailey look at each other and know that Meredith needs her person right then and so they quietly leave the room, leaving the two twisted sisters alone.
"Shh, Mer. You're okay. You'll be able to go home, just not right now." Cristina gets into bed with Meredith and just holds her. She lets her cry and soothes her. "You're okay. Shhhh. I've got you. Shhh." Cristina rubs Meredith's back and she sees Meredith's slowly closing. Each time Meredith would force them back open. "Let yourself sleep Mer. It's okay. Close your eyes." Meredith finally lets her eyes close and she instantly falls asleep, her breaths evening out. She has her face buried into Cristina's chest. Cristina just holds her and lets her sleep.
I'm back from vacation! I hope you guys enjoyed!
