piccolo tesoro

Insecurities

Arabella:

August 24th 2022

I looked at the clock as I woke up. 12:14 pm.

Wow. I slept good.

I want to explore Vincenzo's room. Last night I was so tired and overwhelmed with the blood and the noises from the bathroom.

But now I have time.

I peel Vincenzo'a hand off of my waist carefully as slip out of bed. The room is lit red with the daylight barely showing through the dark curtains. I wander to a large shelf, it has books, knickknacks, jewelry, and a few frames.

I looked at the books, but my eyes immediately caught 'The notebook' I didn't grab it even though I wanted to. The notebook was the first novel I read.

Made my expectations too high.

I smiled as I saw a frame of a family, two little boys and a mom and dad. It was black and white and obviously very old, the man who I assumed was the dad looked just like Vincenzo.

This must be his family. I want to meet them, they look nice. They made Vincenzo, they must be.

Who am I to want to meet his family. We kissed, like two times. But we only made out once. And we don't even have a label. Why would we?

Whatever. I'm fine.

I make my way down the hall in his room to find three doors. The bathroom, probably a closet, and what else? I skip the first door, I had already seen the bathroom.

It was beautiful though, it was darkly lit with dark walls and large tile squares on the floor. A fancy shower and bath. It was beautiful.

I keep walking to the second door, I open it and it's red lit just like everywhere else in his bedroom. It's a long closet, so big it has couches. But surprisingly not as big as the one in my room. The closet is simple, with two couches to sit and then a few racks just holding clothes along with some drawers.

I walked in and shut the door behind me quietly and walk around. I see a wall full of bourbon and different glasses. Drinks in a closet.

Random.

But I respected it. If I was 21 and liked to drink you know maybe I would have some drinks in my closet. Now that i've said that I realize so definitely wouldn't but it's Vincenzo, so it makes since. I mean he's been drinking for a while, learned different kinds and found favorites. Like me with lemonade. Than it hit me.

How old is he?

He's legally allowed to drink I know that. I'm only 19 and he's well, not. How do I ask him how old he is without making him feel bad. What if he thinks I'm older.

That would be so awful, I would let him down. Maybe he would kick me out, be grossed out.

What if he handed me over to my father. God why am I such a baby.

I feel my hands shaking and tears in my eyes.

I cant do this, I want to have a good day.

I shake my head and wipe my eyes as I leave the room and shut the door behind me. I walk down the hall more and place my hand on the door knob of the last door. I begin to turn it when a hand stops me, "You don't need to see that room yet Arabella." I turn to look at the large man behind me. He's still in what he was barely wearing last night. Just boxers.

And they do not hide much...

His hand is on my over the knob and I slowly let go and pull my hand away, "Why?"