The Wallflower

Exposed

"When were you going to tell me, that you're Lady Whsitledown?"

Penelope averted her eyes and stared at the floor of the carriage. What could she say to him?

"Colin, I'm so sorry." She finally muttered still not meeting his eyes. Colin rubbed his hand through his hair and sighed. A few more moments passed before he replied.

"Can't say I'm surprised really. I had a feeling it was you but wasn't completely certain of it." He admitted looking out of the carriage window.

Penelope looked up at him. "You had a feeling it was me?" She asked curiously. He nodded and looked at her.

"Whistledown always felt familiar to me. Not her words per se but how she used them. And I noticed that she would repeat insults about you that you'd said yourself. Like when you said your dress looked like an over cooked omelette last season and then 2 days later she said the same thing. Smart to insult yourself to avoid suspicion. I applaud your cleverness." He said as he rubbed his hands on his breeches. He was nervous but didn't know why exactly. His eyes were drawn to her chest. Her breast threatened to spill out of the top with every heave of her lungs. He shook his head and drew his eyes away.

Penelope sighed and leaned her head back. "I wasn't trying to be clever or to avoid suspicion. I wrote what was true and my dress did indeed look like an overcooked omelette." She still had her eyes closed and Colin found his eyes lingering on her neck. He ached to touch her again. To kiss her. To make her his. He shook his head at the thought. Now was not the time for those thoughts.

"Why though? Why did you start it all. I just don't understand how you could be behind such awful things." He cursed himself as soon as he'd said the words. She looked back at him with tears in her eyes. That had hurt. A lot.

"Lady Whistledown was a way for me to make my mark on the world. I couldn't very well do so as the insipid wallflower, Penelope Featherington. So I created a persona. All I did was expose the deceitful ways of the ton. And you all ate it up, just like I knew you would because that's our society, for you. So judgmental and nosey. People will pay a fortune just to hear someone else's name whispered in scandal. I was tired of listening to all of the scandals and lies and deception and doing nothing about it. So I wrote it all down. Every last thing I heard at social events. And one day my father's solicitor found them and he laughed at them. He thought they were funny. So he helped me publish them." Penelope took a deep breath and exhaled.

"I finally had a way to say all the things I'd been dying to say for years. Things I've bottled up because it was the proper thing to do. I do not regret anything I've posted and I refuse to allow anyone, even you, to make me feel ashamed for my work as Lady Whistledown."

Penelope wiped a tear from her face before continuing. "I know you do not know what it's like to be outcasted by a society full of liars and bullies but not everyone has the good fortune of being a Bridgerton. I'm not going to apologize for making something of myself. Even if I have to use a different name to do so." She said triumphantly.

"That's not fair, Penelope. I didn't ask to be born into the family I have. I didn't choose my looks or my name or my family's station. You can not demonize me simply for being born." He was hurt by her words. He'd always wanted to get out from under his family's name. He didn't want to be liked or admired or even successful just because he was a Bridgerton. He was his own person.

Penelope looked at him apologetically. "Do not think I mean it in a bad way. I adore your family. You and your siblings along with your mother have always been so kind to me. Accepted me like no one else has. It's just, I envy the way your family navigates society so effortlessly. Your family is the absolute best that the ton has to offer. Everyone wants to be a Bridgerton. I've watched the relationships between you and your siblings over the years. Not every family has the same dynamic as yours does. Heaven knows mine doesn't."