Stage fright (OHSHC)

Chapter 17

Warning: talk of kidnapping, and insinuation of SA

"My parents.... Died 4 years ago in a car crash. It was shortly after I had started modeling. I was almost 14. If it wasn't for Kazumi and Yusuke, I don't know what I would have done. They worked so hard for me to pursue my dream, and yet...." Yuki started to tear up as Kazumi grabbed her hand in his reassuringly.

"If you want me to take over, just let me know." She nodded at him and took a deep breath to continue.

"Yusuke is my older brother, by about 5 years. He was just barely old enough to become my guardian when my parents died. The 3 of us started living together then. They were both still in college and working full time jobs to support me. I tried my hardest too, hoping I would have my break and be able to help with the finances if I worked at it hard enough. Then, my manager decided to try and debut me as an idol, and it seemed to work. I was helping Yusuke and Kazu with the finances so they could focus a bit more on school, but I... I just caused them more trouble." Yuki broke down for a bit as a silence fell across the room. Kazumi rubbed her back as he looked at her with concern.

"I know what you're all thinking, but it's good for her to talk about this. She told me it was, and that she wanted to do this. She really cares about you guys. And..." Kazumi trailed off as Yuki wiped away her tears.

"I want to be honest with you. I want to have real relationships with you, and I don't want my past getting in the way, so I want to lay everything out right now.... And you guys can decide where you'll go from there." The host club looked at each other and at Yuki, different expressions on each of their faces.

"Princess, nothing that you can say will change how we feel about you." Tamaki knelt in front of her and grabbed her hands in his. They made eye contact for the first time in what felt like an eternity. She looked away and squeezed his hands.

"Don't say that. You of all people..." she whispered the last part more to herself than to him, but Tamaki heard.

"Yuki, what happened to you doesn't define you. We all like you for who you are. If there's any way we can be there for you, we want to do that. Even Kyoya-senpai." Haruhi unintentionally insulted Kyoya in an attempt to ease Yuki's worries.

"Yes, I would dare say that even my heart is capable of that much, Haruhi."  Yuki slightly giggled at the exchange between the two, causing everyone in the room to smile in relief.

"I... It had only been a year since my parents had died when I started becoming popular. I was holding concerts and meeting fans, and that's where I met Tamoya." Just saying the name sent a visible shiver down her spine.

"You mentioned him earlier... right?" Haruhi asked cautiously, only receiving a nod in reply.

"He was at all of my concerts, came to every fan meet, and wrote me the most beautiful letters. He.... He said he loved me. Since I was still getting started, it was easy for me to get to know him. I had conversations with him and started to be able to pick him out from the crowd. He said he liked me from my modeling days too, and we just kind of hit it off. We were both 14, almost 15. I wasn't in love with him, and he knew that. He said he was ok with it... but..." She looked down in shame as Kazumi looked away from her.

"But he wasn't." She simply nodded at his words. "Don't say more than you want to, ok?"

"Before I had body guards, he was able to kidnap me. I don't know how long I was gone, but it felt like an eternity. Yusuke and Kazumi looked for me desperately, and the police were looking for me too. He.... Uh, they finally found me after a few days and he was put in prison. The rest is my fault. I wasn't honest with the authorities and Yusuke." Tamaki looked at the floor with eyes wide. He didn't have to hear what she said to know what happened. He could feel his heart break at the torment that she had to go through.

"We could never forgive ourselves. I.... I should have picked you up that night. If I hadn't overslept..." Kazumi placed his face in his hands as Yuki wrapped her arms around him and shook her head at him, disagreeing with his comments.

"It would have just happened another time, he was always waiting for me. It's ok, I'm ok." The room grew silent, no one knowing what to say.

"I'm sorry, this isn't about me. Just say whatever you want to, and nothing that you don't. We're all here for you." Kazumi patted her head as his eyes were glued to the floor.

"There was a while after that where I didn't have any concerts. I stopped meeting with fans all together, and I couldn't even do talk shows anymore. I just wrote and sang new songs to release. I couldn't do anything else in my condition. Yusuke and Kazumi took great care of me, and.... I don't know how to say this.... I just need to show you." Yuki got up and walked upstairs, leaving everyone below confused.

"Mimi, what on earth is going on? How did no one know about this?" Haruhi sat next to him and asked, full of concern. "And what on earth happened to Yun? He's not..." she trailed off, afraid to finish her question.

"He's in a coma. Has been for the last month. I'm the doctor who's taking primary care of him. We're hopeful that he'll wake up soon. He has to. Yuki needs him. I don't know how, but her agency was able to keep it out of the media per our request. All we wanted to do was take care of her, and to do what she wanted to do."

"Why on earth did she go back to singing after what happened to her?" Tamaki asked bitterly.

"It's all she knew to do. Her parents always told her to never start something she couldn't finish, and she didn't want them to be disappointed in her. I know it's not logical, but it made sense to her. Me and Yusuke made many demands to the agency for her to go back. No concerts, no fan meets, body guards at all times, and a chauffeur so we would always know she had someone with her. Who were we to tell her she couldn't go back, when she wanted to so desperately? She loves to sing, always has."

"But there were still concerts afterwards. Me and Hikaru went to some." Kaoru said confused. Kazumi smiled and shook his head.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, but that wasn't Yuki. You'd be surprised what a lookalike, some makeup, and lip syncing can do. It wasn't the concerts we didn't want, we didn't want Yuki to be the one doing them. She worked with her lookalike constantly, still practicing for a concert she would never perform just so the lookalike could study her moves and mannerisms."

"Yu-chan must really love her job to work so hard." Honey looked down and spoke for the first time since arriving. All Kazumi could do was nod and another silence hushed around the room.

Suddenly, the group heard footsteps coming from the stairs, and no one was prepared for what was coming next.

"Well, go on, introduce yourself properly." Yuki  said kindly but somewhat sadly as she nudged someone forward to the group, who couldn't hide the shock on their faces.

"H-hello... I'm Ryuu..."