15.Never be the same (;(

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Nanon's POV

It's been two days since I saw Ohm he is not coming to his condo I don't know what he is feeling right now but as long as he doesn't feel the kiss was a mistake I will be fine but what if he thinks it was gross ? As for me I loved it too much that I can't forget it, yes it was me who kissed him first but then he was the one to pulled me into another kiss , another kiss and another kiss which turned into smooch,not only smooch he even kissed my cheek and neck wait a damn min is he attracted towards me? If yes that's good if No why does he kept his hands under my shirt even if he is attracted towards me is he dare enough to say me that he is attracted to me? Is he dare enough to come out as Bi to his family and friends? Is he dare enough to stop his wedding? Is he dare enough to accept his sexuality in first place? Lol don't think too much Nanon it's been 2 days since he showed his face or messaged you so what you are thinking is a big NO. Does that kiss even mean anything to him?Maybe he was just experimenting on me or he might be thinking of me as Sarah...Haaaaaa this is so freaking frustrating let's not jump into any conclusions. Tomorrow I need to go to hospital anyway whatever he says let's just accept it.

Next day

In the Hospital

Jasmine : Good Morning Dr.Ohm

Ohm : You came ! Nice , 10 days were hell to us what magic have you done on buttercup she is not eating or sleeping properly but yeah she is talking her pills watch her we got the surgery date it will be in next 20 days.

Jasmine : Oh sure Doctor. I will look after buttercup.

Nanon in his mind : He looks completely fine I was just thinking too much.

In the lunch

Jasmine : Can I sit here Dr.Ohm.

Ohm : You don't need to ask it's your place.

Nanon's POV continuation

What's with that face he looks silent, is he thinking about the kiss ? He js not talking not eating just playing with the food, I think I need to break the silence because it is very much uncomfortable

Jasmine: Dr.Ohm is something bothering you?

Ohm: No , Nothing.

Jasmine : Where is Dr.Drake ?

Ohm : He is done with surgery ,he will come here any minute!

Drake : Hey Guys hi all of them are here today. Hi Jasmine how are you now is everything okay?

Jasmine: Yeah, I am fine now.

Drake : Again you are silent Ohm, it's been 2 days since you are talking to me is something bothering you?

Jasmine: I asked the same.

Drake : Get the things off your shoulders and spill it out.

Ohm : It's nothing like that I just want to be silent that's all.

Jasmine: You look worried Dr.Ohm

Ohm : Am I being that obvious?

Drake: Very much.

Ohm : It's just I am not comfortable around anyone, I feel like I did some mistake which can't be forgiven!

Nanon's POV

Mistake, Mistake, Mistake that was the word I didn't wanted to hear from Ohm and now  that I heard it's hurts very damn much that if I stay here even for one second I will end up crying ugly. Why don't I disappear from here or something can just swallow me......??

Jasmine : Excuse me I need to go !

Ohm and Drake nodes there heads

Drake : Why? What happened?

Ohm : I fell Iike I am cheating on people.

Drake : What happened Ohm just tell me.

Ohm : I feel gross, I feel I am a cheater , I feel disgusting....I feel like crying Drake I'm going mad...!!

Drake : Tell me what happened exactly? Is it about Sarah?

Ohm : No !

Drake : Then?

Ohm : Do you think I am gay?

Drake : Nanon? Is it about him?

Ohm : Hmmm....I am confused Drake I can't see him in a proper way ! And a friend big NO.

Drake : Will you tell now what happened?

Ohm : I - I had a boner just by kissing him! This is gross Drake I feel like crying while saying this to you..!!

Drake : Cool bro ! You don't need to Panic it's Normal.

Ohm : Normal you say Normal no way this is normal Drake you are not getting me I said I had boner just by kissing Nanon. I don't know how I ended up kissing him but I did and I had boner I can't face him now.

Drake : Emm I don't know if I should ask this but - Did you ? Did you liked it?

Ohm : Very much that I wanted to ruin him at that moment , and I- I slept with Sarah.

Drake : WHAT? Are you mad? When you liked the kiss why did you slept with Sarah?

Ohm : Sarah asked me that she wants me so I gave in but huhhhhh everytime when I was with Sarah I just thought of her but for the first time when I was doing it I was thinking of (gulp) him...My mind was just thinking of Nanon , at that moment I felt very uncomfortable every breath was heavy I felt like dying Drake !

Drake : You like Nanon?

Ohm : I don't know but it's different with him whenever I am with him I feel like I am his first priority everything else is 2nd to him ,he understands me very well , he makes me feel special I know he likes me but never I took advantage of that I agree I wanted to help him to get rid of me but in that process I am falling for him , I feel suffocated when he goes to clubs or any hang out with others, I feel jealous when he talks about others and praises about others ,I feel very happy and safe when I am with him that I started comparing me being with Nanon and me being with Sarah , I feel loved when I am with Nanon but with Sarah I feel nothing Drake even all these days when we kiss or sleep I feel like a piece of flesh infront of me and nothing  else just kissing Nanon made me feel all those things which they show in movies my heart was not at all normal I was having anxiety at that moment.

Drake : Did you talk about this with Nanon or Sarah.

Ohm : No you are the first person , I can't even show my face to Nanon and the thing is more 25 days left for my wedding I can't Fucking stop my wedding if I do my parents will throw me out of there life and the thing about Nanon I need him to move on from me totally he doesn't deserve me.

Drake : Have you thought about that?

Ohm : I am clear about that. He deserves best Drake.

Drake : But you can speak with Sarah maybe she can help you.

Ohm : No !

Drake : Bro you are not getting it ,it's about your whole fucking life.

Ohm : I will adjust.

Drake : ADJUST? What you will adjust? Adjust about your sexuality? Adjust about your love of life? Adjust with the person who you don't love in first place?

Ohm : What can I do Drake I'm a coward who is afraid to accept my own sexuality and come out to my parents!

Drake : The what about you and Nanon?

Ohm : Our relationship can never be the same...

Drake : I'm speechless do whatever you want and cry for life. I'm done with you.

(:(

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