Ruin

49

Friday: 12:10 A. M.
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"And what happened?"

So much.

Where do I even start?

...Maybe at the beginning?

I sigh, collecting my thoughts.

I still can't believe half of it. Especially the things both Mrs. H. and Odaine had to say about all of what's been happening. It's almost like my life has been planned for me, by them, and I was simply an unpaid actor.

One who didn't even know the script.

A puppet to them while they pulled all the fucking strings.

I sigh at the thought. "Nothing really. Just told him it was over, since he obviously wasn't getting it. And told him to stop texting me, like you said."

He chuckles and shakes his head before saying, "And that couldn't have been done over text?"

If it had, I wouldn't have found out half the things I did. So, absolutely not.

I look at Lucas, but his face remains the same. My eyes fleet downwards and settle on his hands which continue to gently massage my feet.

I actually thought he would've been mad, but he seems calm. Too calm.

And honestly, I don't know how I feel about that.

When he's like this, it's like I can't really gauge his emotions. It's like he's only showing me what he wants me to see, which makes me wonder what he's truly feeling.

Yet, I have no clue, and I can only work off of what he shows...and it's fucking scary, to be honest.

But, as of right now, in this very moment, he seems fine. Calm. Settled. At peace.

So that makes me draw the conclusion that he's either truly unbothered, or he's one motherfucking good actor.

I hope to God it isn't the latter.

Inhaling a deep breath, I say, "Honestly, knowing the type of person Odaine is, and how he gets sometimes, I don't think it would've been as effective."

Lucas nods. "So, do you feel better now? Or did you only do it to please me?"

"Of course not! I did it for myself. It was necessary. Talking to him, and hearing all he had to say really showed me that I dodged a bullet. He needs help. And thankfully that's no longer my burden."

"Weh yuh say, the bwoy a get off?"

He laughs, and I swat his arm. But the fact that he's laughing about it, puts my mind more at ease, and I find myself laughing too.

When I sober up, I answer saying, "Actually, it was scary. He doesn't seem his usual self. Mrs. H. claims it's because we're over, and he "misses" me, yada yada, but I think he's really sick. We can laugh about it now, but I really think it's something serious, and he needs help before it gets worse."

I know it isn't my place to care anymore, but seeing Odaine like that, with that wild look in his eyes, and listening to all the things he said, and how he begged me to be with him, when he was the one who broke up with me in the first place, and how delusional he sounded, made my heart break.

While I've clearly moved on, and have learned to fall out of love with him, it doesn't mean I want to see him hurt.

Too bad that that's exactly what will happen if he doesn't get some form of intervention. It's just how it is. It's not my fault he got to be like this, and it hurts knowing his parents are so wrapped up in societal cares, that they don't see that their only son is slowly spiralling out of control.