Finding Heather

Year 5 Chapter 3

Author's notes: As I did in the previous chapters, as of right now anytime Harry is in girl mode, I will be referring to him as Heather. I will still be using male pronouns for him even when he is Heather until he decides to start using female pronouns. If at anytime in this or later chapters it gets confusing, please let me know.

As always the world of Harry Potter does not belong to me but J.K. Rowling

Chapter Three

Thursday, August 12, 1995

Dear Diary,

Ahem, I GOT OFF! In a trial in front of what turned out to be the entire Wizengamot, I was cleared of all charges. There was a horrible woman named Umbridge there who backed Fudge up against anything I said, but Dumbledore was able to convince enough of them of my innocence. I do wish he'd spoken to me though. When I was dropped off, Mrs. Weasley was alone in the kitchen, but everyone came thundering down the stairs when they heard my voice. Apparently, there's going to be a party tonight. Sirius also had a surprise for me waiting for when I got back. He took me upstairs to the fourth floor and opened the door to one of the bedrooms. He, Hermione, and Ginny had spent all morning cleaning it for me! It used to belong to his brother, he told me, which made sense with all of the Slytherin decorations on the wall, but now it was mine. I have my own bedroom here! Ron seemed a bit crestfallen at the sight of the large bed compared to the ones in the room we were sharing, but I was ecstatic! The bed is wonderful, and I do have to admit that green is not a terrible color.

That night after the massive dinner and party, Harry climbed the steps to his new bedroom. It felt strange to look around it and accept that it belonged to him. He took great delight in unpacking his trunk into the wardrobe and dresser. The girls had snuck Heather's clothes into it before bringing it upstairs, and now his drawers were full of all of his clothes. The room was massive compared to what he had at the Dursley's, and the bed was luxurious. In a corner lay a bundle of green and silver drapes which the former owner of the room had adorned everything. Those had been the first things to go, and if he were able to get it down the Black family crest would be next.

Getting ready for bed, Harry decided that from now on in this house, anytime he could, he would be Heather in this room. With his mind made up, he pulled a set of girl's pajamas from his wardrobe, a bra, some knickers, and a robe, and stepped out into the hall to go to the bathroom. Sirius was still downstairs and no one else had a bedroom on this floor so he felt mostly safe. In the bathroom he bathed and changed into his pajamas, then returned to his room after listening at the door for the sounds of anyone coming up the stairs.

It felt so right to be dressed back up. Looking at himself in the mirror that stood atop the dresser, the only things that Heather wished he could change was his hair length and his chest. Both his friends had well defined curves there, which he didn't. Hopefully, they would get to self-transfiguration this year so that he could try and give himself some curves. He took off his robe and climbed into bed, the sheets feeling warm and welcoming, far more so than they ever had before tonight.

The next morning came sooner than Heather had wanted it too. Without the impending doom of his hearing, and sleeping as Heather, he'd slept far better than he had in weeks. A knock on the door and George's voice saying that breakfast was ready called him to wakefulness and convinced him to get out of bed. Before going to the bathroom, he pulled on a pair of jeans and a jumper, which did a very good job of hiding his bra. For once he was thankful that the house was usually cool. He looked in his trunk for a pair of shoes and found trainers he didn't recognize. They were about the same size as his old ones but were shaped slightly differently and had purple on the inside. Confused, but liking them, he laced them up and left the bedroom.

As had become the norm after breakfast, Mrs. Weasley announced that they would be cleaning the dining room on the ground floor. That room wasn't in as bad shape as the drawing room upstairs, but still took almost three days to complete. As the days went by Harry found times to work with Hermione and Ginny, who always seemed to get assigned "girlier" chores such as laundry. Harry didn't mind helping them, Fred and George were constantly under the eye of Mrs. Weasley, which Harry wanted to avoid. Now that he was able to wear what he wanted under his boy clothes, he felt the return of the slight paranoia that that brought. Every time Mrs. Weasley went to hug him, something she did a lot, he feared she would feel the bra under his jumper.

One afternoon five days after Harry's hearing, Tonks dropped by headquarters to help with the cleaning effort. The boys had been given the task of going up to the attic with Sirius to go through and throw out anything he didn't want, which was all of it, while Hermione and Ginny were tasked with gathering all of the sheets and doing the wash. Harry, who had no desire to spend a day in the musty attic, volunteered to help the girls after it was decided that Tonks would supervise them. Harry was fascinated by Tonks and hadn't had a chance to spend any time with her since the night he'd arrived at Grimmauld Place. Mrs. Weasley had arched an eyebrow at him but allowed him to go help the girls. What seemed like a completely boring task was made much more fun by Tonk's presence. She made a game of it, and soon the three of them were competing to see who could get the sheets from a room faster, or when wadded up in a pillowcase who could drop them onto a bullseye Tonk's had set up on the ground floor.

Over the banister all three of them dropped their bundles, with Hermione getting closest.

It was nice spending the day with the girls. Harry felt extremely comfortable around Tonks, who was performing her act of transforming her nose at will and kept them all laughing. He wished he had that power of hers, and she caught him staring at her more than once. When Mrs. Weasley came downstairs to start cooking lunch, they had finished most of the wash and were starting to fold everything. The boys came trooping downstairs shortly after, all of them covered in dust and sweat, and Ron's right hand had a strip of cloth tied around it.

"A trunk smashed shut on it" he said to their inquisitive looks.

Lunch conversation was the twins going on about all the weird stuff they'd found upstairs, from old outfits to a grandfather clock that shot bolts at anyone who passed it. Afterwards it was back to work. Harry and the girls made up the beds in all of the rooms, including Harry's. While they were in Sirius's room, he, on the premise of going to the bathroom, ducked into his room to hide anything of Heather's. They had just gotten done when a cry from the entrance hall called everyone downstairs. There Mrs. Weasley stood by the front door holding a half dozen thick Hogwarts envelopes. They all went into the drawing room to open them, Mrs. Weasley saying she could get to Diagon Alley tomorrow to pick up everything.

 In both Ron's and Hermione's letters were shiny prefect badges. When Ron pulled his out everyone stopped talking. Then his mother broke down in tears and pulled him into a bone crushing hug. For some reason, Harry wasn't able to look Ron in the eye. He wasn't sure what he had expected, had he remembered that prefects were chosen in fifth year. Did he really think he deserved the badge more than Ron did? Did he even want to be a prefect? Vaguely he heard Hermione ask if she could go with Mrs. Weasley tomorrow on her shopping run, to which Mrs. Weasley agreed.

 The next night's dinner was another party, this time celebrating Gryffindor's new prefects. Several members of the order, including Kingsley Shacklebolt, Tonks, Lupin, and Moody were present, giving the evening a fun air. Harry, who was still unsure how he felt about Ron being chosen as prefect over him, stayed mostly to himself. He sat listening to Ron show off his new broomstick to Tonks, while Hermione talked over being a prefect with Lupin, who was one when he was in school. It mollified Harry somewhat that his father and Sirius hadn't had badges either. Of course, Hermione deserved this, she was brilliant and such a rule follower. But Ron? He, Harry, had done so much more during their years at school. Did Dumbledore not think that Harry could handle it? Quietly from the back of his mind came a voice he hadn't heard in months. But only one boy, and one girl are picked to be prefects. And with Hermione getting picked as the girl, and you being a girl, doesn't that mean it should be Ron?

That caught Harry off guard. He had never thought of himself as a girl rather than a boy, more like a mixture of the two. But at the sound of the voice's words, the feeling of wanting to be a girl filled his brain. It was almost as if that was the most right thing in the word. The effect was similar almost to phoenix song. Shaken slightly, Harry excused himself from the party and made his way upstairs to bed. On his way out he stopped at Ron's seat and offered him his congratulations, and he actually meant it. Any feelings he'd been holding onto magically gone.