Chapter 16

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!!!!! TW: Self Harm !!!!!

Adam POV

The cold blade slides across my upper thigh, drops of bright red blood beginning to spill.

Ugly.

Two.

Disgusting.

Three.

Worthless.

Four.

Manipulator.

Five...

I begin to lose count, leaving all restraint behind as I mindlessly cut into my legs, same as always. I might have gone a bit overboard tonight, though. I just can't believe I did... that.

I take the roll of bandages and tightly wrap my thighs, a bit calmer than before. I just needed a minute to... unwind. Thankfully, the bandages cover the ugly scars as new ones begin to form. It's a bit annoying, not being able to wear shorts(due to the obscene amount of slashes decorating my thighs). Still, it beats not being unable to wear short sleeves.

I pick everything up off of my bed, putting it all in my little box. I stuff it back in my dresser drawer, hidden from sight. I place the old bandages onto my dresser, telling myself that I'll toss them tomorrow. I don't want to have to face anyone right now.

I lay down on my bed, exhausted. It doesn't take long for me to drift off to sleep...

- - - - -

My eyes flutter open to the sound of my door opening. I instantly shoot up as the three boys step into my room.

"We need to talk." One of them says, though I can't quite tell who.

I look down guiltily. I knew this was going to happen.

"You betrayed us." Noah says, stepping forward, "I thought we could trust you."

"We don't want you here anymore. You're leaving." Daniel tells me, more serious than I've ever seen him before.

Tears well in my eyes, their judgemental gazes making me feel sick to my stomach with regret. "Please, just one more chance. I'll... I'll do better. This w-will never happen again."

"It won't. We want you gone by sunrise." James orders.

"P-please, I..." I lose the will to speak.

I watch as Noah's gaze moves to my boxers. I start to blush, only for my face to pale.

You can see the bandages.

He steps closer, and I shrink back. "What is that?"

I move my legs behind me, looking down. "Nothing, i-it's nothing..."

I tumble as one of my legs is harshly yanked forward, the bandages torn off in a second.

'Not again, not again,' I think helplessly, memories flashing back.

"Pathetic."

Blood begins to pour as tears spill down my face, each one more painful than the last. They simply shake their heads and leave, shutting the door behind them. The room begins to fill with the miserable mixture of tears and blood, swallowing me whole. I try to scream, but nothing comes out.

- - - - -

I jolt awake, panting and shaking. It feels so real. I shakily wipe the cold sweat off of my forehead, trying to catch my breath.

After a few minutes, I wobble over to my door.

Locked.

I breathe a sigh of relief, knowing it wasn't real.

Still, I throw on some pj pants.

Just in case.

I lay back in bed, knowing I've lost my chance at sleep.

-*-*-*-*-*-

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