Ruin

43

Even laying on my side seems almost too much as it puts pressure on the side of my stomach. 

I sigh, not knowing what else to do. 

Easily deciding that I felt sick due to the position I'm  in, I muster up all of my mental energy to make the drastic change...and I roll over. 

After the initial intensity of the pain wears off, I feel better. Unfortunately that feeling only lasts for about 1.5 seconds before another cramp follow suit. 

I feel weak, and drowsy. 

I am not even that tired-- which is surprising after the way Lucas had handled my body earlier, only to come back home for round two since night--  but being so sick makes it impossible to keep my eyes open. 

I try various positions, but each position brings forth another wave of increased sickness, followed by 2.5 seconds of bliss, followed by the shattering disappointment that it doesn't really help at all.

Thank God that Lucas is a heavy sleeper so me shuffling constantly doesn't wake him. 

This can't be normal. 

I hope to God this isn't what I think it is...

My period isn't due to come until another week. I think.

At some point I decide that maybe a shower could fix the situation. 

So, I stand....then immediately sit back down. 

A new wave of nausea hits me so hard that my mouth immediately goes dry. 

The fact that I've recently eaten Tums makes my mouth feel like I had licked a chalkboard for 10 minutes even after there was no spit left to lick with. 

It probably takes about 15 more minutes before I feel ready to try again. Suddenly, the idea of moving to the shower seems so great a task. After mentally counting to three, I attempt to stand again. This time I sit up slowly and stay in that position for several minutes before standing.

For some strange reason, my mind briefly wonders if I had been food poisoned...but I quickly throw out the thought.

That's ridiculous. 

Who the fuck would poison me?

For what gain?

Finally reaching the couch where my bag is, I rummage through it for my bath rag and a clean pair of underwear. 

When I go to pull out the rag that is entangled in my charger cord, something falls out onto the floor.

Stooping as slowly as I can, I pick up the packet and notice that it is the practically empty remains of my birth control. 

How did I not know that it's finished?

When did I take all of them?

I study the empty packet in my hand, trying to trace my days to figure out if I'd missed any. 

Then I remember I haven't taken any since Saturday. I'd taken the last of the pills before the pool party, reminding myself to refill the prescription, but I've been so caught up with all that's been happening since, that I must've forgotten. 

Shit!

And look how yuh make Lucas come inna yuh eeh!

Ring the alarm because yuh must fucking breed now.

My heart does a double back flip in my chest and another pain shots throw my pussy and up into my belly bottom. 

"Yuh good?"