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.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.
"ya you! you're doing it wrong!"
the dance instructor suddenly yelled at me, making me flinch hard.
"you need to do it like this!"
"I'm sorry-"
I was learning a choreo for a special solo dancer cover segment called "shining dancer" of rolling kpop, which was like studio choom's artist of the month.
the assigned dance instructor is the fixed choreographer of that segment while the backup dancers are from our agency.
as I was learning the choreo there was this one step I couldn't master, a step that includes flexibility. those types of steps are what makes me suffer the most cause I'm not flexible at all.
I try again and again but I fail to do it perfectly at all, soon it strikes 2 pm announcing that the lesson ended.
"is this a joke?"
she frustratingly chuckles, the room in a pin drop silence and filled with tensed air.
"you're supposed to be the lead dancer of the group and what do you think you're doing? that backup dancer behind you dances a lot better than you, you two should exchange places"
the instructor continued as she pointed at someone behind me.
"I-I apologize"
I bow deep as I feel a lump building in my throat.
"such a disappointment.."
I hear her murmur as she walks out of the room.
I stay bowed like that even after she leaves. slowly I feel tears sliding down my eyes that were stinging.
she was a special dance trainer of one of the biggest kpop segment show.. now you've disappointed her by dancing so awfully.. you are a disgrace.. now because of you, the whole group is gonna be under fire and get labeled as untalented fakers cause you're supposed to be the lead dancer but you can't even dance well god damn it.
I scold myself in my mind as tears continue streaming down my face.
"hey it's alright don't worry don't feel bad, you danced really great. even us professional dancers struggle with steps really often, it's alright it's just one step you'll do great"
one of the back dancer, yuju unnie whom the dance instructor pointed as better than me, hurriedly comes and hugs me.
"you're a great dancer, don't question yourself"
all of them slowly approaches me and engulfs me into a hug which ends up making me cry even more.
"if I was really better than you I wouldn't have remained as a backup dancer for this long, would I? don't take her words to your heart, don't blame yourself"
