See Through

15 - You Need a Distraction

With Mitch gone for the weekend, Scott decided to take some time and clear his mind. He went back to the apartment and made himself some lunch and figured it would be a good time to clean. He'd begin after he was through eating.

Once Scott finished with his lunch he began cleaning, moving things around and sweeping underneath them, vaccuming the carpet, cleaning the dust that began to gather behind the TV. He figured Mitch would appreciate all of this when he came home. Even if Mitch didn't notice, Scott just felt productive and needed to do some work.

Scott decided to start the dishwasher. He grabbed all of the plates and cups that piled up in the sink and loaded them up. He checked his room and Mitch's to be sure he wasn't missing any cups. He opened the patio door and peeked his head out, seeing if Mitch had left a drink next to his bean bag. There wasn't a cup... only a little black book with a pen sitting on top of it.

Shit. Mitch left his song book. Scott walked outside and picked it up, realizing that he'd never actually held this book before. Mitch was very protective of it. Scott wondered to himself if Mitch kept some secrets in that book. I shouldn't pry, but it's so tempting. Scott was definitely Curious George in that moment. He opened the book to page one and saw a few cute doodles, one of a Panda holding up a peace sign, and one of the Superfruit logo. Mitchy, you're so talented. Scott laughed. He flipped through and saw that one page had a red ribbon bookmark. This must be his latest song. Scott opened to the page and saw that it was one of many pages. He flipped a few pages back and finally found the beginning. He read silently to himself.

Dear Someone,

Please stop me before I get in too deep.
My thoughts are racing. I cannot keep
This lie that lingers in heart
Because if I continue, I will fall apart.
I'm dark and mysterious, or so they say.
I'm a unique role, no one wants to play
My character because I'm quite confusing.
All of my thoughts are blind, I keep using
You as a drug, every single night.
It's hard to fight without your bright light.
Keep shining for me, although I can't have
You because you think I'm mad.
I'm not mad, just a little bit insane.
I cannot control the thoughts from my brain.
I see you today like I saw you tomorrow.
You can't see me 'cause I'm drowned in sorrow.

Love/Hate, Deteriorate

God, I'm angsty. I don't want to kill myself. I only want to kill my thoughts. How the hell am I supposed to live every single day seeing the face that only looks at me one way? I'm broken. I'm torn and tattered and I have to live like this every day. But it's okay. My life is perfect, some would say. He thinks I'm perfect... but that's not enough. I'm in love. I can't deny it any longer. I'll deny it verbally and to his face, but here and now with fine little lines and empty spaces, I pour a plethora of nonsense. Nonsense. It makes no sense. I've known him since I was ten.

Scott's reading was interrupted by the doorbell. It took him a second to pull his mind out of the book. He wanted to continue reading. I've known him since I was ten... is Mitch in love with me?

The doorbell rang again. Scott set the book down and went inside and reached the door. When he opened it he almost expected to see Mitch. Instead he saw Alex. It took much effort for Scott to smile at those beautiful brown eyes. "Hey, babe." Alex stepped forward and kissed Scott on the lips and drew him into a hug. Scott hesitated before he lifted his arms and wrapped them around Alex. "Thought I'd pay you a surprise visit."

"Oh. Surprise!" Scott laughed with uncertainty.

"Your enthusiasm could draw a knife in me!" Alex rubbed Scott's arms. Scott stepped back, allowing him to come inside. They walked towards the couch and sat down. "You want to tell me?"

"Tell you what?" Scott's voice cracked. He cleared his throat and looked up at Alex.

"You seem super off." Alex frowned. "Is it something I did?"

"No, not at all!" Scott assured him. "I've just... I'm just worried about Mitch."

"Why, where is he?"

"He went to Texas this morning. He's been going through some shit and he needed to take a break from reality. He's gone home for a few days. I'm just really worried about him, seeing as he's my best friend and all." My best friend is in love with me and he's not the one sitting across from me.

"I'm sure he'll come back refreshed." Alex grinned. "So, you've got the apartment to yourself for the weekend, eh?" He scooted closer to Scott and put his hand on his leg. "You need a distraction." Alex ran his hand up and down Scott's leg.

"No, I don't. I just ne--" Scott was interrupted by Alex's soft lips. He grew the kiss and pulled away ever so slightly.

"You need what, Scotty?"

"Y-you..." Scott could easily fold in this boy's touch. Everything he did sent shivers up and down his spine. His speech. His grip. His muscles flexing as he held Scott. His lips touching his skin.

Alex gently pushed Scott back on the couch so he could hover on top of him. Alex was always the dominant one and Scott didn't mind, but it was very rare that Scott got to switch places with Alex. Alex gently bit Scott's lip and tugged, Scott bucking his hips upwards. Scott's hands flew up around Alex's waist and found his hemline, tugging it gently and lifting it up so Scott could have exploration access to Alex's back.

His warm hands snaked up and down Alex's back and Alex flittered his tongue against Scott's lip, hoping he'd grant access and deepen the kiss. 

Minutes later and Scott and Alex had tangled themselves up, shirtless, on Scott's bed. Alex lathered kisses down Scott's chest and down to his pant line and he continued kissing while his hands went to work on unbuttoning Scott's jeans. He unbuttoned and unzipped and pulled them down to his knees and immediately went back up to Scott's mouth with a vicious attack. Scott's lips opened when he felt a hand graze along the bulge in his boxers.

"Fuck!" Chills went down his spine.

"You like, don't you?" Alex smirked. "You'll like this even more." Alex dove down, surprising Scott by pulling his boxers down to his knees and using his tongue to drive Scott crazy.

"Shit. Mitch!" Scott threw his head back and his eyes widened. "Alex..."

Alex shot his body up and stared at Scott with a defensive look in his eyes. "Scott, what the hell?"

"I'm... I"m sorry. I ju--"

"You're about to have sex with me and Mitch is still on your mind?" Alex got off of Scott and stood a few feet from the bed before spotting his shirt.

"I just got caught up in the moment! I swear it meant nothing!" Scott didn't know what to say. He knew he'd screwed up and there was no going back from that.

"You don't just say another man's name while you're caught up in the moment with your boyfriend, Scott." Alex pulled his shirt over his head and straightened himself up as best as he could.

"Alex, I--"

"No, we'll talk about this later. I need to leave." Alex walked towards the door and opened it, and Scott was making his way out of the bed and stumbling over his pants and boxers still at his knees. He struggled to pull them up as he chased Alex.

"Please, just let me explain!"

"There's nothing to explain right now. I get it, Scott." Moments later, Alex was walking out the door, leaving a stressed Scott behind.

What have I done?