Five of Hearts

Chapter 35

"I should go talk to him," I mumbled, wiping the wet tears from my cheeks. Embarrassment washed over me like a cold shower of shit water. There wasn't any way I could have felt any worse.

"No, don't worry about it, I'll talk to him," Atticus stared at the door Thane had just stomped out of. Before either of us could say anything, a car roared in the garage and someone peeled out of the driveway. "Shit."

Atticus grimaced before turning to me and giving me a quick kiss on the cheek as I leaned into him. He lingered for just a moment before pulling away, a frown on his lips.

"I'll go find him. Just go meet Hudson outside to workout. I'll be back soon," he said softly and then turned to leave.

I watched him go, misery sitting in my chest. This isn't how I wanted it to go at all. I wrung my hands and slowly began to change into my workout clothes. Thane looked so broken. I started to hate myself. Why did I do it like this? How could I reject him this way? Right after we shared such a special moment, when I tried so hard to make him feel like he deserved everything. Like he deserves me. And then I just throw it away.

Tears sat in my eyes but I sniffed them away and finished tying my shoes.

This is all my fault. I've ruined everything.

Thane is never going to speak to me again.

"Nice! Now try the spin and aim for my neck," Hudson instructed. Immediately my body reacted, doing exactly as he said. Hudson barely had time to block it. "Damn, you're fast. Definitely use your speed to your advantage."

I huffed in response.

"Alright, keep coming at me. Just try to get me down," Hudson breathed heavily. There was a small smile flitting around the corner of his mouth. I knew what it meant; I could read him like a book. He was proud of me, impressed by my motivation, and, unfortunately, very aware of the emotions running rampant in my brain.

But I very quickly obliged.

I wanted to hit something.

I threw a few punches and blocked a few from Hudson before I crouched and spun, letting my leg sweep him off his feet. He recovered quickly but I didn't let that deter me. I grunted and swung; he blocked a few punches, but many of them hit. I knew I didn't have a lot of power behind my punches, so I swung with all my might. Hudson tried to push me off of him and land a blow to my ribs, but I jumped out of reach, caught his arm, and twisted it back.

"Ah! Okay, Hattie. Give," Hudson wheezed, but I ignored him. I swung myself onto his back and brought my elbow down on his shoulder, harnessing the speed he had instructed me to utilize. He sank down onto his knees on the ground. "Okay! Okay!"

Again, I spun around his front, straddled him, and continued punching. I didn't hear anything. I didn't see anything. I wanted to forget everything. He grasped and reached for my arms to grab hold of them, but I never let them stop moving.

"Fuck, Hattie!"

My hits finally slowed out of sheer exhaustion enough for Hudson to grab my hands and hold them still in the air, his knuckles turning white at his tight grip.

"Shit. I-I'm sorry," I gasped, my lungs burning.

Hudson sat up though I still straddled him, drawing his face just inches from mine. It would have been awkward or romantic or something had it not been for the fact that I was focusing intently on trying not to break down. "Don't worry about it. Let me see."