eternity// 5SOS

33

cw// self harm (recovery)
Michael

"Hey man, what are you up to tonight?" Ashton said, jogging up to me as I left work, "I told Poppy I'd see if I could swing by,"

"That's fine by me, feel free to dine,"

"I'm gonna head home to eat and change if thats okay, I know scrubs aren't a crowd favourite,"

"I'll see you later then,"

I got in my car and checked my messages, seeing one from Jasper; he had driven himself to therapy, but said he was way too upset to drive himself back home.

I rung him as I pulled out of the car park.

"Dad,"

"Hey dude, what's up?"

"Everything,"

"Alright. I'm gonna get Elijah and head over to you, I won't be long,"

"Okay,"

"Could you send me the address to remind myself please?"

"Yeah. I will do it now,"

"Brilliant. Make sure you're sat down, see if you can get a drink. I'll see you soon,"

I got home and asked Elijah to join me, then we turned back towards Jasper.

Elijah was happy to come and I was pretty sure it was out of boredom. While the little kids were feeling the liberties of no school, and the fun of a pool, the elder kids didn't find it so fun.

It was a huge shame really that the holiday was cancelled because I got to bond with everyone, but hopefully we could fulfil their boredom another way.

We arrived, and Elijah immediately consoled Jasper, giving him a tight hug. Honestly one of the best things over the last few months had been watching the pair of them grow closer again.

"Let's get you home," I said, kissing Jasper's head as he leant into my side, "Elijah is gonna drive your car,"

"Thanks,"

"I'll go now,"

He hurried off, meanwhile Jasper and I trot behind. From the outside he appeared to be calming down, but whether the inside reflected that, I did not know.

"I don't wanna talk about what has upset me, genuinely. But, I love you and please don't leave me,"

"I'm not gonna leave you,"

"I just wanna be a kid again. Lauren is going to grow up so loved. Cameron and Payton have grown up with your love. I want that. I want to grow up with your love,"

"Jasper," I said, swallowing back tears, "Hey, you're still young. I know it's not the same but we can take some responsibilities off you. Going to university will help you make friends too,"

"It's not fair,"

"It's not, most things aren't. I am so proud of you for starting your journey to heal,"

"I just wanna be a kid again. I made so many mistakes,"

"You should never have been put in the position where you were allowed to make that mistake. And we can't change what has happened but you know, some of the best experiences come at your age now, so we can make new memories. Plus, you kinda get to be a big kid at Christmas huh? And you will always be my kid,"

"Yeah,"

"Let's get you home. Ashton is coming by later,"

"Can I go and see Calum?"