Elliot

Fourteen

Clara wouldn't stop talking about it for the rest of the week. She was like Dad, but in much more annoying state.

"So are you boyfriends now?" she'd say.

"Clara... we're dating." I'd say.

"Okay but when are you gonna be boyfriends?" she'd say.

"I don't know—why are you asking me this?" I'd say.

"So did you fall in love first? Or did he?" she'd say.

"Clara, shut up." I'd say. Did I fall in love first? Am I in love?

"Did you guys go on a date yet?" she'd say.

"Yes—I mean... no. No, no. Not yet." I'd say.

"Where did you even meet him?" she'd say.

"Oh my god, Clara, shut up!" I'd say.

"We need to talk about a lot of things," she'd say.

"No. We don't need to talk about a lot of things. Shut up." I'd say.

And it would end there. Then the next day she'll blabber about it again. And then the next one too. And the next one. And the next one. And so fucking on. I think this is one of the reasons why I didn't want to tell her.

***

"Sorry I had to drag you like that." I said. "I was coming out to her that time and I thought it might be also the perfect time to introduce you to her. So I just... went for it."

It was a chilly air that made me shiver. Tobias' man-cave-van doesn't really have any heater so we just had to snuggle in with a blanket.

"It's okay." Tobias chuckled. I love hearing him chuckle. "I'm proud of you actually. Though, yes, it was surprising."

He was proud of me. My sister was proud of me too. And also my dad. Shit.

We stayed silent in the chilly afternoon. The sky was plain orange. It was beautiful. And I'm with my most favorite person in the world. That even made it more beautiful.

"So," I said. "your birthday's coming up."

"Oh, wow. I actually forgot."

"You forgot your own birthday?"

Tobias shrugged. "Lost track of time?"

"That is a lame reason."

He laughed. "I'm not very good at reasoning." He rested his head on my shoulder. "Though, yeah, my birthday's coming."

"So are you gonna throw a party or what?"

"I don't know. I don't feel like celebrating."

"Why?" I said. I felt his breath on my neck and that didn't help me from my shivering rate. I think he's whole face is buried on my neck now.

"I just don't feel like it."

"You need to celebrate your birthday, Tobias. You're turning twenty-one."

"I don't need a celebration." He sighed. His breath was tickling me. "I only need you."

That is so fucking cheesy. That is just so cheesy why would he say that. I swear, Tobias is the weirdest human being I've ever met in my whole life and—

"Are you blushing?" he said.

"What?" I said. "No I'm not." Am I blushing? Is that even possible?

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not. I don't blush. I don't do that."

He grinned. "You like it when I say things like that, huh?"

"No I don't. Shut up, you fucking cheesy."

Tobias laughed and it made the whole moment warm. There was just always something in his laugh that would make a certain moment good. His laugh was a whole song that he composed and I would love to listen to it on repeat.

I closed my eyes in the safeness that surrounded me for the moment. Sometimes I wonder if he ever felt safe whenever he's with me. I couldn't help but open my eyes again and look at the most beautiful boy beside me.

Everything in him was perfect. He was the main art in a museum full of other arts. I didn't know how to describe him more than that. He was just beautifully perfect.

But every perfect things could crumble. It could have the slightest mistakes and it would make it imperfect. I held his hand like the first time I did.

What's bothering Tobias Antoine?

I still wished I could take away his pain by holding his hand tighter.