Grey Thorns

Chapter 30- Ashamed

Liam's bed was two down from me. Another thick built, blond was in between us and on the other side, the dark haired girl. Some crawled in their beds and some grouped up and talked. Liam and I were one of few that got in our beds. I lay flat on my back and push my hair back from my face with an exhale of air.

I have to make it. I have to prove myself wrong. I am my own enemy.

I grow deeper in thought and recall the encounter with that demon at the dorms. You are the dusk and dawn, the in between night and day. I'm more than a weak human. I must be. If I'm wanted by so many, than there must be a reason I'm here. I have to prove myself worthy. I don't know how, but I must. The bed next to me owned by the guy wasn't claimed yet so I turned my head to glance at Liam. He was on his stomach, arms underneath the pillow. But his eyes were open and on me. He smiled subtly like he was inside my head again. He can still hear every thought I have but he hasn't said a word to me here. He must not be allowed. I was still ashamed to look at him so I turn over with my back to him and hope he doesn't continue to stare. I'm afraid if I'll sleep, I'll have a nightmare again and seem even more foolish.

***

"Everyone up!" Gabriel calls in the room. I jolt awake and force myself to sit up. Everyone else seemed neutral. I was still lacking. Everyone grabs dark clothes from the drawers so I do the same. A few guys started dressing here in front of everyone. Two of the girls did the same. Liam was among the group. I went to the bathroom and quickly changed. The clothes fit like spandex, making me look tinier. It was too form fitting. The amount of fat on my stomach was visible through the shirt. I tried to stretch it out a little but it didn't work. I stared in the mirror as I braided my hair and grew more disgusted. So I left and sat at the edge of my bed to tie the black shoes. In the hall, I walked behind Liam unintentionally. But I stared. The clothes fit him too well. The muscle throughout his shoulders was visible underneath the long sleeve shirt. I had to look away.

The arena was lit enough the be visible but still dark. Gabriel was waiting in the back corner. I stop with everyone else, next to Liam. I was between him and another guy, both towering over me. I remember the days I was considered tall.

"Morning my children. Your first lesson will be simple. My faithful Liam will be the one to demonstrate all the simple tasks you must learn. First being," he holds up a circular blade with sharp tips around it. It was just a little bigger than his palm. "Aiming. First you will throw, then you will shoot, then you will fight. Fighting will be at the end of the week." He glances at me.

"Step forward Mr.Arrow." he grins and holds out the blade. There was a target about 20 feet away from him. He turns the blade in his fingers as he turns to the side, and pulls his elbow back. His movements were quick and effortless, but the blade cut halfway through, in dead center of the target. He picks up the 3 laying on the table next to him and throws them one after another. I noticed the girls make a comment about him and grow jealous quickly. Too quickly.

I cleanch my teeth down until my jaw was set totally flexed.

Lunch came after demonstrations all morning. Two guys sat next to me and the girls in front of me. Liam was with Gabriel at another table. I stared at him until he caught me and didn't look back up at him again. "Why aren't you eating little one? Don't mortals need all the energy they can get?" one of the boys teases. I look down at my food. "You sat next to me just to torment me?" I mutter lowly.