After getting away from his cruel father's tyranny, Randall has to learn how to live again, and accept the person he was meant to be - with a little help of a local bartender...
*****
An empty shell is all what is left of twenty-five-yea...
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-Randall-
"And how did that make you feel?"
"I don't know..." I mumbled, looking away from Vaughn and his intense stare.
"Can you describe the thoughts you had when he hugged you?" he asked.
I was getting really frustrated. I nearly got up from my seat and walked out, but when I turned to look at the door, knowing Cole was right there behind it, I forced myself to stay seated. I cursed myself for bringing up the hug he gave me last night.
But I wanted to know why it bothered me.
"I... When he said... that he... wanted to hold me..." I muttered, thinking about that exact moment, trying to find the words to describe the things I'd felt. "I... felt... bothered."
Again, I wanted to walk out.
"I suck at this," I sighed and leaned back instead of leaving.
"So, it was his words that bothered you?"
"Yes," I said. I didn't mind being hugged, but I wasn't comfortable enough to say that out loud at that moment.
"He showed affection towards you," Vaughn said slowly. "Both physically, and with his words. You weren't bothered by the hug itself, but by his words, correct?"
"Yeah," I said, calming down a bit. "I... I think... when he said that, I... I just didn't want him to say that. It didn't feel right."
"In what sense it didn't feel right?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, it seems like he has feelings for you. What he said to you is a strong indicator. Is that why it bothered you?"
"That he has feelings for me?" I spoke. He nodded, so I shook my head. "I've known that for a while. It was more like... Why? Why would he say such things to me? To me? I'm... I'm a mess."
"Ahh..." he breathed out and leaned back in his seat as well. "In other words, you don't believe he should have feelings for you?"
"I... I don't know..." I mumbled, taking in a deep breath, and turned to look at the door again.
"I'm making an educated guess, but it sounds to me that his words made you insecure. Perhaps it bothers you because you're not used to having feelings like that. Words in general hold power over you, which would explain why you reacted to his words, not to his physical affection."
I had no idea if he was right or not. I was not used to feelings, that was for sure. I wasn't used to any of this. I wasn't used to anything.
"Would you be willing to talk about your feelings toward Cole?"
I tensed up right away when he said that. My need to get up from the seat grew so strong I couldn't hold still anymore. I didn't go to the door though, just paced in front of the chair for a moment.
