Acceptance | Gay MxM |

15. Trust in Him

"I... Okay..." I muttered, and he nodded.

"How about breakfast?" he asked with a smile and glanced at the kitchen.

"I don't think I have any food in here," I said. "Sorry..."

"That's all right," he said and hesitated before he continued. "We could go get something from the store, but I have plenty of food at home. Maybe you'd want to stay at my place for a while?"

"Why?" I asked.

"Well... I have a nice, cozy guestroom, and my living room is basically a small movie theater," he explained, looking around in my cold, barren home. "And I have lots and lots of food."

I wanted to say no, but why would I want to stay here? With nothing to accompany me but misery and fucked up mind?

So... I nodded. "Sure... I... I think I need to get out of here for a moment."

I'd only drive myself crazy if I stayed here. Crazy and... dead.

"That's what I was thinking," he said gently. "Grab some clothes and everything else you may need."

I did as he asked and went to find a big enough bag to pack my stuff. I felt... glad. I'd grown to hate being in that apartment. Now more than ever. There were nothing but bad memories of me being swallowed by my messed-up head. And what I'd almost done last night...

The walk to his apartment was a silent one. Getting out of my place felt... good. I liked the fresh air... and the company. The fear faded a little as I took careful glances at Cole. His calmness was soothing. He knew what to do now. I was so numb I couldn't even consider trying to figure out what to do now. I wanted to stay numb because I was still too scared to let myself think about anything.

So... I needed him to do it for me.

We arrived at his bar, but instead of stepping in, he led me behind the corner and stopped by another door.

"I live upstairs," he explained while opening it.

There was only one flight of stairs we had to climb up to reach his apartment. When he let me in, I stopped to stare at it all.

His apartment couldn't have been more different from mine. It was clean and tidy, but filled with stuff. Even the entrance hall was packed. There was a bookshelf on the left side of the door with a desk next to it, and a wardrobe hidden in a small alcove covered with curtains on my right, while the floors were covered with thick carpets.

I took a few careful steps deeper and saw his kitchen on my left. It looked like he owned every possible cup, kettle, and appliance anyone could possibly need to make food. The living room was at the opposite of the kitchen, and it was just as he'd said: it was a small movie theater.

"Make yourself at home," he said gently, walking past me. "Come. I'll show you to your room."

I followed him past the living room to a narrow hallway. There was a bathroom on our left, and another room with a closed door next to it. The bedrooms were on the right. He walked past his own and stopped to open the door at the end of the hallway.

"Here. You can stay here as long as you want," he said, pushing the door open.

It was a really nice bedroom. A big bed, big windows, cozy interior. I had never cared about stuff like that, but that room... It sure looked nice. Welcoming.

"Thank you," I muttered, lowering my bag onto the ground.

"Take a look around if you want," Cole suggested. "I'll go make us breakfast in the meantime."