Unheard Voice and Unexpressed Feelings [2018-2020]

Hard to deal with cos of introversion

I know that I am hard to deal with cos of introversion. I always want to stay alone and at home and don't have time to socialize. I know gikapuy na kaayo mo nako, how much more as akong self gikapuy na pud ko. I thought people would try to understand that I am like this. I can still change this and I am just starting to come out from my shell. I know lisud ko pakisamahan kay KJ biya. Serious pirme. Pero bisan ingun any ko I always try my best nga maglikay nga makapasakit og feelings, wala koy i-underestimate nga taw, motabang pa gani ta. I go by the golden rule, don't do to others what you don't want others do unto you. Is that correct? Ahahaha!

Fyi, I am working on this and would like to change this one step at a time and I start reaching out to people who are close to me. They are the very people that I expect to understand me and help me realize things. I know naa koy beatings batasan, I acknowledge that. In fact, kita man tanan! Naa pa gani mas worse. What I want is be true to me. Kung naa man koy nahimo nga sayop, isulti nako kay para mausab og ayaw na pakapini og paliya kay mopait na. Ayaw na samuti pa! Kana bang okay kaayo basta mag-atubang ta unya diay what your mind says otherwise, ang imong pagtan-aw nako lahi diay. Ni contradict sa imong treatment nga maayo kaayo.

I am tired of getting stepped on and get underestimated. Emotional and sensitive ko but I am trying not to take things seriously cos I don't want wrinkles at my age. Ahahaha! But today I am happy and grateful cos I know those people (the true ones) that I can trust, won't backstab me and would never say things against me being introverted. It might be so few, like I can count with one hand, but still, I am blessed to have them. I love you so much, guys. You know who you are and I know who you are! Thanks for being true to me and being there for me after all the attitude I have shown. I am so sorry if I can't hang out with ya often. Yunno already why.

PS. Don't mind this post. I remember someone posted on an introvert page about the same thing and I thought to voice out and let the people who understand me know that I truly appreciate them.

Yuchae Moon
March 16, 2018