Prince of Lies [COMPLETED]

Chapter 44

The scent of sunshine and straw filled Frederick's senses, temporarily reminding him of days he used to adore. It had taken too long to return to this place, making him ashamed for it.

He heard her before he saw her, her excitement palpable as he made his way through the stable. Cecile circled her stall, whinnying and stomping. The clever thing had sensed his presence long before he arrived, unable to contain herself now.

"Hello, dearest," Frederick said roughly. "How have you been?"

She could barely keep still, pawing at the straw to be free.

Frederick laughed softly and lifted the latch. "All right. Just a moment."

Cecile hurried out, rubbing her face against his with tenderness and welcome. He threw his arms about her neck, the silky press of her mane tickling his cheek. "Gods, it is nearly the end of summer. Why are you still shedding? Are you just as stressed as I am." He caressed her noble face and savored the feeling. To be reunited with Cecile after so long ... "Let us take a turnabout the grounds."

He led her by the reins onto the grass, water filling his eyes as he raised his head to the late-summer sun.

He'd spent hours in this very place, training and training his horses. It had been uncomplicated. Rewarding. He used to think that having his horses would be all he needed to be fully content.

Now he had to search himself and ask when he'd allowed things to go wrong. Search for when he became so dissatisfied. So conniving. So unappreciative of his many, many blessings that he was willing to harm people who didn't deserve it.

If his mother could see him now ...

Cecile's nose nudged his shoulder, causing him to smile weakly. "I cannot ride you today, my love. I am unworthy of you." She nuzzled against him, and he buried his face in her mane and groaned. "If only you knew what I've done. You would be so ashamed of me. I gave my wife to another man ... now she's lost to me."

He guided his horse along the flower-framed paths, the sun dappling over their backs and wind streaking through their hair. Such freedom. He didn't know when he'd have it again. Didn't know if Arabella would get to enjoy this despite the seeming freedoms she received as Saebane's wife.

She's likely with him right now. Doing what ... he couldn't stand to think about. She belongs to him because you are a fool.

He halted before Cecile's favorite fountain and allowed her to drink, and when she rose, he took her face and assessed it. "Something is wrong with you, my dear. You're not your usual, elegant self."

Warmth leaked down his face as he viewed her. It was all heaving down upon him with the force of the universe. His lies. His betrayals. His actions. His consequences.

His negligence of his beautiful horses. "If I lost you, too, Cecile ..." He wiped his nose. "You are far too young to be so sick. If you—"

"Frederick!" someone called.

He did not turn back to acknowledge the person coming toward him, continuing to turn Cecile's chin this way and that. "I don't like the look of these hairs. I will have to have someone examine you at you once."

"Frederick!"

He glanced over his shoulder, surprised to see Gweneth but uncaring all the same. She could see him like this. Had seen much worse from him. So many low moments in his life. He could only go lower. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Tell your father to fuck off already," she said. "He needs to stay out of military affairs and allow me to handle it—as he entrusted me to do when you left. But I can't get a moment of peace with him undermining my every—Frederick, what's the matter?"